BATES MOTEL SEASON FINALE RECAP! AH!!!!

After an intense first season we have finally come to the end.  I am kind of relieved the finale is here because this show kills me week after week.  Thankfully, the finale really delivered, setting us up for season 2 with a bang... well not really a bang, but... it's good.  I see a lot of awards in this shows future, especially with Farmagia's powerful performance.

We open with Norma storming the police station like she is storming the Bastille.  She screams through plexiglass that it is a "matter of life and death."  The secretary is flippant, but Sheriff Romero calls her into his office.  Norma tells him all about Abernathy's threat and is met Romero's general coldness.  All he tells her is that he will take care of it, not telling her anything more.  He promises no harm will come to Norma or her sons.  She needles him about a plan, but tensions raise as she is met with silence and Norma walks out.  The Sheriff looks very conflicted after her.

We find Emma staring at the Winter Formal poster looking rather glum.  Norman walks up next to her and comments about how pathetic she looks, trying to be cute, but coming off with the Norman weirdness.  She tells him nobody has asked her to go, and tries to play it off like shes fine, but Norman sees past her flippancy.  He tells her that he would go with her, to which she responds that he will only be going with her because he feels sorry for his friend.  He agrees, that's exactly why he is doing it.  Emma smiles and replies, "Okay jerkoff, I'll go with you.

Norma makes breakfast for Dylan and it seems like a sweet moment until she begs him for a gun.  Dylan immediately says no, even after Norma explains the entire Abernathy situation.  She tells Dylan that even though the Sheriff promised they would be safe, she doesn't trust him, saying she thinks he is as bad as everybody else in town.  Duh.  Dylan only replies, "You and a gun is a bad idea."

The Sheriff pulls his car up to what looks like an abandoned garage.  Next to a dusty old car sits a chest... and what's in said chest?  150k in a duffle bag.  DAMN IT SHERIFF!  You are the worst law enforcement of all time.

In town, Norma has some dry cleaning to do.  On her way into the store, she bumps into a man who gives her major attitude and Norma finally blows screaming "SCREW OFF SHIT HEAD!"  Norma realizes she may be losing it and shows up at Norma's psychiatrist's office.  He is surprised to see her without Norman, but quickly realizes that she is here for her own needs and lets her in.  Norma asks the doctor how she can better handle stress.  he asks what kind of stress to which Norma replies "Normal life stuff."  Oh yeah, that normal stuff like rape, murder, Asian sex trafficking, patricide.   The doctor quickly turns the whole session around on her, asking he about Norma growing up and how he feels about how he will be leaving her soon.  Norma deflects until he asks her if this is what she thought parenting would be like when she was a little girl.  At first she says she doesn't remember getting a far away look in her eye and almost speaking in a baby voice.  She opens up a bit, speaking highly of her dad and saying almost nothing about her mom, and it all seems too perfect.  When the doctor asks if she has siblings, she says no but quickly her mood changes.  She gets jumpy and makes weird faces.  She quickly excuses herself saying her stomach is upset and she has to go home.

Norma find Miss Watson, aka Miss Sexy, on the phone screaming at somebody, telling them never to call again.  She is in tears as she stares into the rain and Norman makes his presence known by asking if she is okay.  She asks how much he heard and he lies saying "Nothing."  He tells her that he definitely does not want to publish his story.  She tells him that's fine, but asks him again to forget what he saw.  She touches his face and tells home that they have a secret now, before giving him a very un-teacherly hug.

The Sheiff pulls into the driveway of a broken down house.  A women with a busted face is getting out of her car and we realize that she is Keith's sister.  She remarks to Romero about how she hasn't seen him since Keith's funeral and how it was odd to just bury a hand.  Romeo tells her that he is here on business, asking her what happened to her face.  When she doesn't answer he tells her that he knows that she was doing the book-keeping for the sex business.  Romeo asks if it was Abernathy who hit her, but she says she knows him by another name.  Abernathy had threatened her about the money, but realized she didn't have it and left her alone.  After her confession she asks Romero what he is going to do and he tells her nothing as long as she keeps her mouth shut.

Emma walks into the motel for work as Norma is on the phone, making sure the house is still being patrolled.  When Norma hangs up, Emma tells her that she and Norman are going to the winter dance tonight.  Norma is surprised, but when Emma shows her the dress she brought, they have another mother/daughter bonding moment.  Norma holds the dress up so Emma could see how it would looks with heels, and Emma sees the scar on Norma's leg.  Norma panics, immediately saying that they scar is nothing, she just spilled hot chocolate on herself when she was a kid and that it's no big deal.  Norma leaves in a rush, but Emma looks after he knowing that Norma hasn't told the truth.

As Norma walks back to the house, Dylan pulls up and actually gives Norma the gun she was asking for.  Norma looks relieved, but Dylan tells her not to make him regret this decision.  Dylan takes her out back and  teaches Norma how to shoot.  He gets super pissed when Norma prematurely fires the gun, but like Norma, she deflects asking him what kind of job he has that he needs a gun.  Dylan confesses that he watches the weed fields.  Norma judges him, but Dylan is not having it, giving it to her about how he is a grown man who can make his own choices.  Norma ignores the outburst, aims and shoots hitting her target.  She is overjoyed, and then we all realize that Dylan called her mom.  Norma breaks down in tears of happiness and fear, confessing how scared she is.  Dylan tells her to trust in Romero.

Later on we find Norma playing maid again.  She is startles by Keith Summer's sister, telling Norma that if she has the money she better give it to Abernathy because he will kill her.  Summer's sister says no more as she goes to her car and drives off leaving Norma panicking on the porch.

Norman is doing homework on his computer when the doorbell rings.  He is startled to find Bradley there asking for Dylan.  Dylan comes down the stairs with a box of Bradley's father's things.  The three of them stand awkwardly in the foyer until Norman excuses himself to finish his homework.  Bradley thanks Dylan again for his help, even if they almost got shot doing it.  She promises that she won't bug him anymore, but Dylan assures Bradley she can bug him any time.  Norman stands in the doorway listening to the entire conversation with tears in his eyes.

We find Norma in her bedroom playing with her new gun.  For a minute it looks like she is going to commit suicide  but she pops open the chamber and it looks to be empty.  In the room next door, Norman freaks the fuck out that he can't find black socks.  He storms into Norma's room and she quickly  hides the gun.  They scream at each other about the missing socks and Dylan comes in saying Norman can wear a pair of his.  As Norman pulls on his socks he gives Dylan major attitude about Bradley.  They have a very brotherly fight over her and Norman tells Dylan to just date her.  Norman is clearly at the boiling point and I am already starting to get scared.

Norman and Norma wait for Emma.  As the time ticks by to midnight, Norma begins to feel her life slipping away.  She only has a few house to meet Abernathy who very well may kill her.  Norma turns to Norman and tells him that she wants to confess something to him that she has never shared with anybody before.  Norma begins to weave the horrifying tale of her childhood.  Norma's brother forced her to have sex with him starting wen she was around 13.  Her father was violent and abusive, and her mother is an empty shell of a women.  Norma got the scar on her leg because one day, while her brother raped her, her father came home early and in her rush to not get caught a hot iron fell on her leg.  Norman is horrified as he tells her he is so sorry.  This was Norma's suicide note.  Emma's knock interrupts an intense mother/son embrace as they put on their happy faces.  Norma watches Emma and Norman go to the car, and her face tells us that she thinks this is the last time she will see them... but at least she looks happy.  That is, until Abernathy calls to remind her of their appointment.

 The Winter Formal is a bit too perfect for this small town, but whatever, I can look past it.  Emma is beaming, but it is obvious from moment one that Norman has eyes only for Bradley.  This is going to be awkward.

Back at home Norma fills her gun with bullets.  For some reason, she is packing a bad full of clothes, stuffing a pillow inside as well.  WTF is she doing?  Is she going to bolt?  Or does she really think that will fool Abernathy?

Back at the dance, Emma and Norman slow dance, but Norman is too focused on Bradley to notice Emma's longing.  Emma finally has enough and storms out, leaving Norman without a ride.  Norman turns away to find Bradley's boyfriend in his face.  He asks him to step outside and silly old Norman follows.  Bradley's boy tells Norman to leave her alone and that he knows what happened between them.  Apparently Bradley told him that Norman took advantage of her grief to sleep with her.  Before Norman can defend himself, he receives a serious punch and is left on the floor in the rain.

Norman decided to just walk home in the rain, nose bleeding and all.  A car pulls alongside him and we find Miss Sexy staring at him.  She tells Norman to get in the car and is horrified when he sees his bleeding face.  Miss Watson offers to take Norman to her home to clean him up and then give him a ride back to the motel. He agrees.

Norma is at the dock with her lame duffle bag of "money".  A car pulls up, but it's not Abernathy's, its the Sheriff.  Norma hides behind some fishing gear and watches as Abernathy and Romero confront each other. Abernathy asks who the Sheriff is, wondering where the "cute but nutty lady" is.  Romero says he is in charge now.  Norma watches from her hiding spot as they have a bit of a man-off, and she is trying to decide whether to shoot or not.  Romero tell Abernathy he wants to go in on the biz with a 50/50 split, kicking the money back over to Abernathy.  Abernathy reaches for the bag and Romero SHOOTS THE SHIT OUT OF HIM!  After that, things went like this:
Romero: Not in my town you piece of shit.  You can go home now Norma.
Norma:  I almost shot you!
Romero:  When I say trust me, trust me.

Our next shot opens with a very tight close up on Miss Sexy's boobs.  Miss Watson's dress is quite inappropriate.  As she cleans Norman's wound, his eyes role to the back of his head and the audience can feel that we are losing him.  Watson tells Norman that she will drive him home after she changes and the proceeds to strip in front of a mirror.  Norman watches with adolescent nervousness as he teacher slowly strips.  Suddenly Norma appears, wearing her hair exactly like the mummified version of herself in Psycho.  She even effect the "Norma/Norman" voice from the movie as she admonishes Miss Watson for her strip show, ending with "YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO!"  Fuck.  Fuck.  Fuckity Fuck.  The next thing we see is Norman running through the rain.

Norma nearly hits Norman as he runs home.  They hug and cry, Norma sees Normans face and he explains what happened.  But Norma doesn't freak because she is just so relieved!  She keeps telling Norman that everything is going to be okay, that everything is back to normal and they are safe.  It all seems like such a happy ending as the frame closes on the Bates Motel sign.

But it's not over yet.  Our worst suspicions are realizes as we find a pool of blood in Miss Watson's bed room.  She lies dead with her throat slit.  He killed her.  Norman killed her.  Well fuck

Can. Not. Wait. For. Season. Two.

Bates Motel: Underwater (RECAP SPOILERS)

Oh man!  This show knows how to serve up suspense and horror.  I am really enjoying how they are giving us a great homage to Hitchcock, because there has been very little blood and gore and yet my heart pounds between commercial breaks.  Tonight's episode was mostly set up for the season finally, but it still delivered a lot of gasps and at least one HUGE "OH MY GOD!" moment.

The episode opens with Shelby's body being carried from Bates Motel yet again, this time with a bunch of stoner onlookers.  Inside we find Sheriff Romero staring at the stained mattress where last week we saw Shelby's body grinning up at Norma.  Norman tries to comfort his mother with some tea, but this time Norma is really shaken.  Romero asks if she has any idea who did this and she immediately accuses Abernathy, since not only was he creepy, but he was asking a lot of questions about Shelby and Summers.  Norma tells Romeo that Abernathy was convinced that she had something that Shelby was supposed to give to him, but she has no idea what.  When Romero pushes the subject, Norma goes... well Norma and demands to know why she is a crazy magnet.

The next day, Dylan and Norma take the mattress out of the house.  Dylan is pissed that Norma is making them set fire to the gross mattress, also complaining that Norma will "make a meal" out of this ordeal for the next year... but to be fair, it was fucking horrific.  Norma meets them outside and tells the boys she smells something.  For a minute you think "oh shit another body," but it's just the hippies smoking weed.  Norma goes bananas on one of the stoners names "Rauf" who gives her lip about the town being built on weed.  She screams at him basically telling him that this isn't the town, this is her property and on her property there will be no weed smoking.  Norma then takes Dylan aside asking "What kind of people are these people you brought here."  He alludes the question and Norma FREAKS out.  She screams about hating this place and moving.  Norman doesn't seem to keen on this idea.

Bradley lays fully clothed in a bathtub.  She looks forlorn when suddenly BOOM!  Norman pounces on her, drowning her, hands around her throat as she gasps for air.  Even after Norman wakes up from this dream, he continues to fantasize about drowning her.  That's weird Norman, get it together.

Emma comes early to help Norma organize the motel office.  Norma tells her to just trash everything other than the original deeds and any paperwork pertaining to the property.  Norma also tells Emma that she will not tolerate any pot smoking at the motel so she should "bust up" any of that nasty behavior.  As Norma walks out the door she runs into a flower delivery man.  Emma comes out as well, commenting on the gorgeous flowers and Norma looks over the moon... until she reads the note... "See you soon."  Chills!  Norma immediately calls the Sheriff's office, but once again he isn't there.  She leaves a message with his very flippant secretary about the flowers and demands that Romero get in touch with her.

In town, Dylan runs into Bradley.  She gets weirdly flirty with him and asks if he knew that her dad had an office at Gil's place, where Dylan is currently working.  Bradley wants to get inside her dad's old office to get some of his stuff.  She manipulates him and Dylan reluctantly agrees.  Dylan isn't the only one in town though, Norma is as well and she busts into the office of the Realtor that sold her the motel.  She demands to know why he didn't tell her about the bypass, but he swears he didn't know it was going to be approved.  Norma demands her money back, asking him to put the motel on the market ASAP with an immediate open house.

In school, Norman stares dreamily at a sign for the winter formal.  Miss Sexy, I mean, Miss Watson, catches up to him, gushing about how wonderful the short story he wrote is.  In fact, she thinks it so good that it could be published.  And, if that wasn't great news, she also informs him that he's gotten strait As for the quarter.  Norman seems really happy about all the news and agrees to meet Miss Watson after school to edit the short story for publishing.

Norma gets back to the motel and plays maid to the hippie nastiness   As Norma returns to her cart she sees a black car slowly drive by.  She can't be sure it's Abernathy, but it doesn't matter, at this point he is in her head.  Back in the house, Norma does an internet search (on a search engine I've never seen before) for "safest cities in America."  Norman comes in and Norma demands that he lock and bolt the door.  Norma meets Norman at the top of the stairs, and Norman is carrying the newly taxidermied Juno.  Norma tries really really hard to be proud of his work, but you can tell she is freaked out.  Norman tells her the good news about his 4.0 average, saying that he really loves his school, but Norma points out that he is the one getting the good grades, not the school.

In his room, Norman uses this unknown search engine to look up "Drowning someone in a dream."  Dylan walks in and upon seeing the stuffed Juno immediately says "that's juts weird dude."  Norman shuts the door and asks if Norma has said anything more about moving.  Dylan says he hasn't, but then he sees Norman's internet search.  He asks about the dream, but Norman says it's just a dream, reading from the website that dreams like that means that he is overwhelmed in life.  Dylan pushes to know who he was drowning and after trying to avoid answering Norman admits that it Bradley.  Dylan looks horrified, but admits that what he assumed, Norman swears it was just a dream and that he has never wanted to hurt anybody in his life, "except you once and a while."

At Gil's pot farm, the potheads are processing a FUCKING TON OF WEED.  Dylan takes Gil aside and asks if Bradley's dad had an office there.  Gil misreads the question, thinking that Dylan is asking for an office, and since Gil is so furious with her dad he tells Dylan he can have to office, "Just throw all his shit out."

Emma goes to work at the motel and finds a young kind of cute stoner smoking weed.  She goes to confront him, but he quickly runs into his room.  Emma doesn't back down, knocks on his door and tells him he needs to stop.  He tries to sweet talk her, asking is she wants some, but she is a verbal Zorro and gets him to snuff out the joint.  As she walks away the cute hippie watches her.  Ah young stoner love.

Miss Sexy and Norman work very closely on his short story.  Norman's story is about a man who is on fire on the inside, how do you deal with daily life when you are burning up and can't put it out.  Miss Watson stares into Norman's eyes, as they sit way to close, and tell him what an old soul he is.  She gets misty eyed for a moment, and you think they may kiss, but quickly the get back to work.

The night, the stoners are outside singing GooGoo Dolls for some reason, but "Slide" is one of their best songs, so whatever.  The Sheriff pulls up and Norma watches, hoping he will bust the stoners.  Romero asks where they are working and when they answer "Gil's Drydock" he gives them a nod and goes to Norma's office.  The Sheriff really hates Norma.  He gives her attitude about the flowers, they could be from anybody, oh and Abernathy, he doesn't exist the info is fake, oh and, you cleaned the room he stayed in, oh and you didn't get his drivers license   Norma is stunned by the lashing she gets, asking what Romero is going to do.  Romero answers "Nothing.  Call if anything happens."  Then he walks out.  Norma finds her balls again and runs out the the Sheriff "LIKE WHAT!  IF HE DIGS UP ANY MORE DEAD PEOPLE AND PUTS THEM IN MY BED!"  Romero coolly responds "Yeah, like that."  Oh yeah, something is def up with Romero.  I don't know what yet, but he is involved, either with the sex slaves or the weed... maybe both.

At school, Norman and Dylan smile at each other.  At first Norman looks okay, but then defeat spreads across his face and we hear a whisper of that high pitched squeal that turns him psycho.  Later, Bradley meets Dylan at a dinner.  Dylan says he is just going to pack up her dad's things and give them to her, but Bradley gives a sob story about how he mother threw all her fathers stuff out and it feels like he is completely gone.  Dylan falls for the sob story and promises to get her in the office, even if he know it's a bad idea.  Bradley, what the fuck is up with you?

Emma is back working at the motel.  When she gets in, she finds a cupcake waiting for her from the stoner who she "busted".  The apology note attached gives us the name Gunner.  The phone rings and Emma picks up.  On the other end a guys looks for "Dave" but she tells him its a wrong number and hangs up.  Emma decides suddenly to eat the cupcake.  She eats that thing like she has never eaten a cupcake in her life, shoving it into her face.  Up at the house, Norma is looking at real estate, finding a cottage in Hawaii that she is really excited about.  Norman doesn't want to here  it, he doesn't want to move saying, "I won't do it and you can't make me."  Norman is sick of starting over, he knows it will be the same because Norma "does things that don't make sense," ultimately calling her "CRAZY!"  Before either of them could respond to Norman's outburst, Emma wanders in looking like Gandalf the Grey and suffering from a really bad paranoid high.  She kind of freaks out, but Norma figures out she is high and makes Norman get her some food.  Norman tries to apologize for calling her crazy, but she responds "just get the toast."

Dylan and Bradley sneak into Gil's warehouse and are immediately met with gunfire.  Luckily it's Remo and once Dylan identifies himself he stops shooting.  When Remo sees Bradley he is dumbfounded, constantly calling Dylan a dumbass for bringing her there.  Dylan swears that they will just be five minutes in the office and Remo lets them go.  In her dad's office, Bradley gets misty eyed.  Dylan goes to give her a minute but Bradley asks him to stay because she likes having him there.  Bradley has some serious problems with men.  She tells Dylan she is just looking for a gold pocket watch, but as they look for it, Bradely finds some love letters from "B".  She immediately thinks that he father was having an affair and runs out.  Dylan chases after her, but not before taking the letters.  Outside, she demand to know who B is and why her dad would do that.  Dylan responds by saying "People are complicated.  He was still your dad, he still loved you."  Who wouldn't love Bradley.  Apparently nobody.  They hug for a little too long before getting out.

Norman is in bed and Norma comes in asking if she can sleep in his room.  Norma says he'll sleep on the floor but Norma insists that they will both fit and Norman's bed.  When he agrees, she gives him the creepiest, happiest smile.  They are snuggled up together talking about sleepovers they had back when Norman was a kid, and they get weirdly intimate.  Norman rubs her arm and she kisses his neck as the chat.  They both apologize to each other, Norma about the move and Norman about calling her crazy.  its... its just wrong.

Norman goes to see Miss Sexy (that's her name now) the next day.  Norman says he doesn't want to send in his short story because he doesn't think his mom would like it... because she wont get it.  Miss Sexy asks how the therapy is going and he admits he only went once.  Miss Watson (just in case you forgot her real name) tells Norman that he doesn't need to tell his mother, but he says it doesn't seem right.  Miss Watson tells him "I know what its like for you," and you get the impression that she was once in an abusive relationship.  She seems to be connecting with Norman on a level a teacher never should.

Norma goes back to the Realtor's office to see how the plan's are going for the open house.  Unfortunately, there won't be an open house.  Because of the bypass, nobody wants to buy the motel, it's only worth half of what she paid for it.  "It's underwater," he tells her.  Norma threatens to sue, and he basically tells her to go ahead and try as he is basically bankrupt.  So what does Norma do?  She beats him with her purse.  Seems rational.

Norma gets in her car to find a ticket on her windshield and it seems like it's the last... OH MY GOD ABERNATHY IS IN THE BACK SEAT WITH A GUN!!!  Abernathy tells Norma that Shelby owed him 150k from the last batch of girls.  He is convinced she has it and wants her to bring her the money tomorrow night.  He asks her over and over if she can do that, and she agrees to bring the money.  WHAT MONEY NORMA!  YOU DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY!  Oh Lord... Abernathy tells her that if she falls through, he will kill he sons, and then her.

Thanks to pickupthepi3ces on tumblr.

Next week's season finally is sure to be epic.  Just think about the terrifying moments that have come at the end of nearly every episode, imagine how those moments will culminate into a season finally!  CAN NOT WAIT!

Bates Motel: A Boy And His Dog :( (spoilers)

First I have to say that unfortunately due to work, I am missing a Q&A with Freddie Highmore through the actors fund tomorrow.  UGH!  I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS FOR HIM!  BOO!  Stupid job.  Whatever I get to see Jonny Lee Miller tomorrow night, so be prepared for a blog post on that, possibly linked with Thursday night's episode of Elementary.  Anyhoo, even the title of tonight's episode made me want to die.  Damn it!  THIS SHOW IS TOO MUCH!  We are getting close to the season finally of Bates Motel, and in a way I'm kind of glad, the intensity of the show requires breaks, just like American Horror Story.

The show opens with Emma's Dad teaching Norman about taxidermy.  The scene is kind of sweet, Mr. Decody apologizes to Norman for his loss, going on to tell Norman that he thinks he will love taxidermy, that he is artistic enough to do it.  But here is what's weird, Norman seems totally okay with Mr. Decody taking apart the dog her fell in love with.  He says that it seemed "dishonorable to put her in the ground."  I guess that's why in 20 years or whatever he doesn't bury Mommy Dearest.

Cut to Emma having a serious breathing episode.  She runs into the bathroom, dry heaving and struggling with her inhaler.  When she finally catches her breath, Emma overhears some of Bradley's friends talking about Norman, and what a sad weird-o he is.  They talk about how he would be crazy to think Bradley would ever sleep with him.  Emma gets pissed and reads those girls hard, telling them the truth about Bradley sleeping with Norman.  "By the way you have toilet paper on your shoe," BOOM!  EMMA OUT!  But here's the thing, Emma's little outburst ends up coming to bite Norman in the ass.  Later in the episode Bradley confronts Norman about telling Emma.  She begs Norman to just forget it and not to tell anybody else about it.  Norman snaps and storms out of school followed by the uber sexy Miss Watson.  With tears in his eyes he tells her that he just wants to go home, but when she tries to pull him back into school he practically knocks her over pulling his arm away.  Ruh-roh.

Norma reads the newspaper that morning only to find that the bipass is still going up, rendering the Motel pretty much useless.  She calls Romero at the station but doesn't get an answer.  It seems like for some reason Norma has decided that she and Romero are besties now.  Anyway, as she's on the phone she see's creepy Abernathy smoking a cigarette and staring through her window.  Norma decided to play maid and goes to clean up #9.  Abernathy is still in the room, but insists she clean up even while he is still there.  The situation is awkward as Abernathy grills Norma about Shelby's death, asking Norma about the nature of their relationship.  Of course Norma goes full denial about the whole thing.  Things get even more awkward when Norma breaks the bedside lamp and suddenly Abernathy is on her.  COME ON NORMA!  You are a rape victim.  What the fuck are you doing in that creepy man's room!  Norma tries to leave but Abernathy stops the cart... OH GOD!  But he just takes two towels and moves on.  What the actual fuck.

Back on the pot farm Dylan gets a call from his boss to go on a run.  Unfortunately, Dylan only understands half of what he's supposed to do and Remo gives him attitude   It is obvious that Remo can't deal with Dylan's inexperience.  The two men go on a road trip together and you know it's going to be a rocky ride.

Norma goes down to Romero's office.  She is weirdly nice to him, but he is obviously unenthused.  She tells Romero that she wants him to help her finagle her way onto the City Planning Committee so she can put a stop to that bypass.  Norma feels that they should help each other because they are the only two that know the truth about the sex trade ring and what really went down.  After all, he's the one who rewrote the story so he looked like the hero.  But Romero was not having it.  He threatens her right back, using the phrase "burn you down to the ground."  Boom, somebody put Norma in her place baby.  Just as Norma leaves her verbal lashing her phone rings.  Norman's school asks for a parent conference to discuss his behavior.

Norman gets suspended for three days for cutting.  Norma plays defensive mom as Miss Watson and the school principal discuss Norman's emotional instability.  Norman doesn't interact with other kids, he is emotional, quiet and reserved.  Miss Watson thinks that Norman should speak with the school psychologist but Norma quickly nips that in the bud.  She tells the school officials that she would rather Norman see a private therapist, hoping that will get her out of it... until Miss Watson asks for the name of whatever therapist she chooses.  Norma is obviously just trying to protect her son... but she is digging into a deeper and deeper mess.

Dylan is on the road with Remo.  They are at a bar and Remo is piss drunk, bragging about his 23 years of experience.  Dylan calls Remo out on his drunkenness and the men come to blows, Dylan kicking some ass even with one are.  The fight ends in a bit of a stalemate, but Remo warns "you better watch it golden boy or I'll try to destroy you."  Then, like, five seconds later, the two men are talking casually.  Remo tells Dylan that he "doesn't have leadership potential."  Remo has been working for the "big boss" for 23 years, but Dylan hasn't bet him yet.  Dylan tells Remo he should just quit, but Remo says that there is no quitting .. you only get fired.  Literally.  FIRE-d.

Later that night Norman apologizes to Norma about what happened in school.  Norma demands to know exactly what happened, but Norman doesn't want to talk about it.  Norma begs Norman to not be so emotional all the time, he needs to fit in.  Norman thinks he does fit in, then immediately wants to go to a taxidermy lesson with Emma's dad.  As Mr. Decody puts Norman's dog's sit on a dummy, Norma has private words with him.  Norma doesn't think that Norman should get into taxidermy, because he is unusual enough as it is.  She doesn't want him to be labeled a freak.  The conversation gets awkward as Norma tries to backtrack on things she says, but Mr. Decody assures her this is good for Norman because his is calm.  "What could go wrong."  Famous last words.

Dylan and Remo meet up with some uber hippies for the job.  Remo tells Dylan that one of the guys is an ass and should be left behind, but Dylan makes an executive decision to take all the hippies.  That is until a few hours later as annoying hippy plays the guitar loudly and give Remo attitude about lunch.  Well, Dylan pulls his gun on the guitar playing hippy and tells him to get out.  It is the first time that Remo seems to have any respect for Dylan.

Norma gets back to the motel and see's Abernathy leaving, so what does she do?  SHE FOLLOWS HIM!  What the hell Norma.  Abernathy goes to the docks and Norma follows him to Kieth Summer's boat.  Somebody needs to sink that fucking boat because what the fuck.  That is like the boat on the river Styx.  Abernathy is obviously looking for something but doesn't seem to find it.  He leaves and you think Norma is off the hook and then BAM!  ABERNATHY IN YOUR FACE!  SHIT!  He knew she was following him!  He keeps telling her that he wants "It" and for the first time Norma really has no idea what he is talking about.  But he earlier lie about her relationship with Shelby comes back to bite her in the ass.  He tells her Shelby was bottom run and he is top.  When she is ready to talk, he'll be in #9.

Norman and Norma are in a therapists office.  The therapist asks Norman questions, but Norma answers for him every time, and Norman just parrots her answers.  Norma tries to avoid making another appointment with the doctor, but he asks for a word in private.  The doctor thinks that Norma could use a bit of therapy herself due to her control issues.  He tells her that sometimes when people feel the need to be in control on the outside, on the inside they are a mess.  Norman FREAKS OUT at him.  She tells him how in control he is and to back the fuck off.  GOD VERA IS SO AWESOME!  THROW AWARDS AT HER PLEASE!

After therapy, to prove how in control she is, Norma goes to #9 and tells Abernathy to get out.  She throws the money in his face and he struggles no to lose it with her.  He once again brings up her relationship with Shelby, but she tells him he has no power over her.  If he doesn't leave in 5 minutes she is calling the cops.  The last thing Abernathy says before leaving is "You wana play, we'll play."

Norman is playing with his stuffed dog and he seems delighted.  Emma comes in wanting to talk about why she spilled the beans about his sleeping with Bradley.  She explains about the nasty things the girls were saying about him and she just couldn't keep her mouth shut.  She tells him how special he is to her, how he is her only friend and she doesn't want to ruin it, even if she does have feelings for him.  Norman accepts her apology and they hug.  Emma's dad walks in mid-hug and gets awkward about it, but Emma tells him its okay.

As Norma disinfects #9, Dylan pulls in with the van full of hippies asking Norma to put them up.... even though they are all drug dealers.  Good Dylan, get your mom involved in the drug trade.  Well, Norma is just DELIGHTED!  To thank him, she asks Dylan to go to dinner in town and he agrees and she nearly floats away with happiness.

Norma goes to change, and we just know something is going to happen..... but what did happen I did not expect.  Norma goes into her room, turns on the lights and... SHELBY'S CORPSE IS ON HER BED SMILING AT HER!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!  No joke, I actually got nauseous over this twisted turn on events.

I can't.  I just can't.

Bates Motel: The Man In Number 9 recap (spoilers)

I know this pic is a commercial but I think it's really cool

Oh.  I can't.  I'm too broken by this episode to write a coherent opening paragraph.  I'm sorry.  This show is amazing, but it literally defeats you.  I mean, I guess that's it's purpose, but you are exhausted emotionally after each episode.  In a way I'm kind of happy the seasons winding down because I may have a mental breakdown soon.

The episode picks up where last weeks ended.  Sheriff Romero shows up to find Shelby dead, Norma beaten, Norman bleeding and Dylan shot.  Just when you think he is going to snap, Romero turns and kind of anticlimactically says "We'd better talk."  Alright...  Cut to Norma saying "And now you know the whole truth."  You're not sure how much she's told, but it slowly unfolds that the whole truth really did come out.  Romero admits he had suspected Shelby was up to no good and makes up the perfect cover story, spinning the whole thing so the Sheriff Romero is the hero and Norma is off the hook.  Norma and Norman are ecstatic and do some creepy "boyfriend/girlfriend" looking hugging.  But not everybody is happy.  Dylan was not only shot, but given the short end of the stick in the cover story, being "the guy who got in the way."

Cut to Bradley and Norman back in bed.  Oh I was so ecstatic   I was so happy my theory about Norman raping her was wrong.  They tangle in the sheets and Norman insists that Norman is downstairs and won't hear them.  There is a pubescent awkwardness captured, those strange and beautiful moments you had a teenager as you figure out what the hell is going on with your body... and other peoples bodies.  I am so relieved that they are in bed, that when Norma yells "NORMAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?"  I nearly pooped my pants.  Norman throws back the sheet and OH MY GOD THANK GOODNESS IT'S JUST A DREAM!  So Norma chats with Norman about the motel opening as he nurses his morning wood.  Ah, the creepiness... it never gets old.

Before going to school, Norman fixes some lattice work under the house.  He finds a dog under the house, its snarls and growls and Norman, and Norman calls to it hammer in hand.  In my heart of heart I thought we was going to bash it's brains in but thank the Lord Jesus, he lets it run by him.  Meanwhile, Norma is in the kitchen being the perfect 50s Mother to Dylan... until he tells her that he is still moving out.  She gives him the now famous Norma passive aggressive guilt trip, and sends him out with the trash.  As Dylan struggles with one arm at the dumpster a man drives up looking for the Seafair Hotel and Keith Summers.  He serves extreme creepiness to Dylan before driving away.  Jere Burns is an incredibly gifted actor, creepiness and insanity being his specialty.  Its great to see him in a role on this show.

Norma begins trying to promote the motel, first going to a restaurant with an amazing 60s vibe.  But, they won't help promote the business because of all of the controversy   With no booking and no backing, Norma starts to freak out.  She stares at her empty booking list, but when she looks up she sees a man trying to get into a room.  It's so creepy but Norma in classic Norma denial looks past it, giving him the key to #9 which he wants booked for one week every two months.  Burns' character, Jake Abernathy is SOOO creepy and you have to wonder why he wants the room.  I started thinking about what it must be like to run that kind of motel, the kind of trust both you and your customers need.  I could never handle that.

Dylan comes home to find Abernathy in residence.  He isn't happy about the arrangement, and tells Norma that he is going to check him in.  He asks Abernathy for his license and credit card.  Abernathy is not happy to oblige  saying he's in the system, but when Dylan explains that the system is new, Abernathy gives his license and a boatload of cash.  A suspicious Dylan goes back to the house to find Norma trying in Vain to scrub Shelby's blood from the steps.  "You can't get blood out of stone Norma," Dylan comments as he drops the wad of cash in her face.

The next day Norman and Dylan use the cash to buy paint for the stone.  The whole episode Norman tries to get Bradley's attention, but she has given him the cold shoulder.  This is the first time Dylan meets her, and you get the weird feeling he may be into her.  He asks Norman if he has slept with her since the first time, but he says he hasn't, but he puts in on the fact that she just lost her dad.

That night Norma has trouble sleeping, and when she hears a noise she is out of bed in a flash.  She goes downstairs to investigate and finds her kitchen door open and slamming against the wind.  Have you ever heard of locking your door Norma?  Well, Norma can't figure out how the door could have possibly opened and just goes on back inside.  Oh come on.  You just know it's Jake Abernathy.

The next day Emma shows up looking for Norman.  Norma answers, and Emma asks if they have gotten a dog, as Norman has left food out for the dog under the porch.  Norma goes to tell Norman that Emma is here, but he tells her to make up and excuse for why he can't see her.  Norma snaps, she is suddenly all team Emma, but Norman says he doesn't want to lead her on.  So, having not much else to snap about, Norma yells at Norman about the dog food and storms off.

Norma, tells Emma that Norman doesn't feel well, but when she notices Emma leaving in tears, she offers a bit of a girls day out.  It's kind of sweet actually.  In the car they start a bit of gossip about Norman.  Norma asks Emma if she knows whats been up with her son and Emma kind of TOTALLY SPILLS THE BEANS ABOUT BRADLEY!  WHAT THE FUCK EMMA!  And then THEN EMMA TAKES HER TO BRADLEY'S YOGA CLASS TO SPY ON HER!  WTF WHY!  But when Norma see Bradley and realizes she is the girl who took Norman to the party she has a bit of a mini-stroke and starts imagining them having sex.  WUT.  Norma storms off nearly leaving Emma in the dust.

Later that day, the dog is back and now Norman has given it a name, Juno.  Norman gains it's trust, but Norma scares it away.  I can't help fearing for this dog's life... Oh GOD!  Later that night, Norman asks if he can keep the dog, and even though at first Norma is resistant, when Norman says "Normal families have dogs," she agrees... but then things get weird.  Norma sits Norman down at the table to have "the sex talk" holding his hand.  "Sex is a serious thing" she tells him, but then basically tells him that Bradley is a whore, "You don't know that girl well enough to be screwing her."  Norma talks about women after sex as like, crazy witches that have crazy juices flowing through them after sex, practically touching her boobs as she explains.  Norman is building in anger, and when Norma drops the bomb that she's hired Emma, Norman freaks, telling her she has no right to pick who he should date.  Norman storms out and Norma freaks out screaming and slamming doors.

Norman goes to Bradley's house and it all goes to shit.  Norman gives her this big romcom speech, confessing his feelings... but then the big let down.  Bradley doesn't have feelings for Norman, it was just a thing that happened.  Well... I'm glad he didn't rape her, I've never been happier to be wrong.  Norman is devistated and he storms off, ticking off everything his mother says as the ringing that signifies he's losing it builds.  Bradley chases after him and you want to scream "NO BRADLEY DON'T!  HE'S GONE PSYCHO!"  She finally catches up to him, asking if he's okay, but he only responds "I don't think you're a nice girl" as the ring builds.  I thought he was going to strangle her, but his trance breaks as Bradley hugs him and apologize.  Thankfully all Norman does is walk away.

Back at the motel, Norma is in the office and is nearly scared to death by Abernathy.  He tells her that he likes the motel better now, offering to spread the word.  Then, he asks to book the entire block of rooms for the first week of every moth for his "sales" people.  Norma looks leery, half-joking "it's not anything illegal."  When he laughs off her accusation she turns on the Norma denial and books the rooms for him.  What the fuck Norma.  I actually thought the words "you dumb bitch".

I don't even want to talk about this last part.  Don't make me.  Please.  Oh God.  I didn't even really watch.  Because I knew...  Norman gets home, broken up about Bradley and find his dog on the other side of the street.  He calls for Juno just as a car comes.  He tries to stop her, but she is already running toward him and that HORRIBLE DOG YELP comes and you know Juno is dead.  Norman screams "I KILLED MY DOG!"  And I vomited up my heart.  WHY DO THE DOGS ALWAYS HAVE TO DIE!  I have had dogs my whole life, I have two now and I know the pain of losing a pet is one of the horrific feelings in the world.

Norma runs out in the confusion, but Norman demands to be taken to Emma's father because "Emma's dad can fix dead things!"  And now we know why Norman loves taxidermy.  Take a good hard look Norma this is your future.  Norman spills the beans about Bradley, and Norma tells him that he will take him to Emma's Dad.

I'm so upset about the dog dying I have nothing left to say.  Dead inside.

Bates Motel: The Truth (spoilers)

OH MY STARS!  Just when you think this show can't get any more intense you have a mini-stroke from tension.  How do they do it!?  How do they keep me so glued to this show!?  HOW DOES IT KEEP GETTING BETTER!  Ugh, before you know it the season will be over and we will be back to... well A&E really doesn't have much else.  Anyway, in tonight's episode we get the tea and lots of shade.  Sorry, I watched RuPaul's Drag Race first so... Here's the breakdown.

The episode starts with Norma in strait up shock over the news about Shelby's sex trafficking.  As she sits comatose, Emma seems to think water is the key snapping Norma out... But Norma snaps out of it all on her own, running strait to the car.  Norma and Norman struggle over the wheel, but cooler heads prevail as Norman gets that Psycho look in his eye and is able to convince Norma that justice will be served, but not right at this moment.  As Emma watches their car spin in circles she looks weirdly turned on by the whole family crisis.

Dylan is dealing with a crisis of his own.  His buddy Ethan is dead, and he ran the killer over... so he's dead too.  It would seem Dylan is in a pickle.  In complete and total fear, Dylan goes to his drug boss, terrified of what is going to happen, and as he tells his story your heart pounds.  Please don't let this guy kill Dylan!  But quite the opposite happens... He promotes Dylan who now becomes the boss of the older, wiser and crankier  Remo.  And The Truth, Remo is not happy to have this kid as his new boss.

A kind, gentle Norma, goes to check on the Asian sex slave.  She brings the girl food and water and in with warmth and kindness  checks the girls wounds before covering her with a blanket.  Emma is ready to get to the police ASAP, but until Norman and Norma get the belt from Shelby they are stuck.  Norma does some great voodoo and convinces Emma to let the girl rest.  This seems to pacify Emma.  Norma asks if Emma is okay to drive home or if she need to call her mom.  When Emma explains that her mom abandoned her, Norma seems to soften toward the girl immediately  even telling Emma that she is brave and the she would be proud to have a daughter like her.  Emma grabs Norma in a vicious hug, which at first is totally weird, but Norma softens and gives a proper "mother/daughter" hug.  Norman even tells his mom "That was really good.  You were really good with her."

Things get weird with Norma and Norman again, as he sits with her at the vanity while she puts on makeup.  Norman asks if there is really anything wrong with him, but Norma deflects trying to focus on how to deal with Shelby.  Dylan walks in, and suddenly he is in on the plan.  You know what they say, "The family that's fucking crazy together.. well no yeah they are just fucking crazy together."  Norman tells Dylan about the boat and the brothers head out to search it for the belt.

On the car ride to the boat, Dylan tells Norman that he put a first and last payment on a great house, and that he still wants Norman to move in with him.  "No crazy people," he tells Norman, it will just be a peaceful easy life without their mother.  But Norman is not ready to let her go, no matter what Dylan says.

We find ourselves back on the God Damn boat.  Seriously, if I never see that boat again it will be too soon because every scene on it is fucking terrifyingly, heart pounding to the point where you feel like you might throw up.  Well done.  As the boys looks for the belt, music rises and tension builds and Dylan tells Norman that he thinks Norma killed his biological father for the insurance money.  When Dylan asks Norman for a screw driver I half expected Norman to stab him with it, but thankfully, Norman left the crazy at home.  The boys find the belt and dump it.  Step one: complete.

Norma anxiously waits for the boys.  When a car pulls in, she thinks it's them, but of course fucking not.  UGH THIS SHOW IS GOING TO GIVE ME AN ANEURYSM!  It's Shelby looking for a quickey.  Can I just stop here and say Vera acts the pants of in this scene, looking horrified as Shelby gets all up on her.  If she doesn't win any awards for this show I will be sad.  Anyway, Shelby brings her down to the Motel to get it on... but the slave girl is staying down there... OH BOY.

Shelby plows away at Mama Bates, but she is not having it.  Of course, we all know why she is giving him the dead fish, but Shelby is not getting what he wants.  Norma lies and says she's just worried about Norman, resolving to get more into in... until a shower turns on in the motel.  Fuck.  Shelby goes into cop mode and before Norma can think of a good lie, the girl opens the door.  Seeing Shelby she freaks out and runs into the woods.  Shelby tries to shoot her, as I say "Oh shit" about a thousand times.  Norma knocks him down, but Shelby gives Norma a mini-beat-down before running after his goods.

Just then the boys pull up, but before Norma can tell them what happen, Dylan states that he and Norman will be leaving.  Norma starts throwing a mini-temper tantrum  but does explain to the boys what just happened.  The brothers freak out and try to get Norma out of there, but she is still having a hissy fit about Norman possibly moving out.  Well that Norm freak-out just made them lose time they needed as Shelby holds the three of them up at gunpoint.

Shelby brings them back up to the house, pacing the kitchen with the mantra "What are we going to do."  The scene is so intense I actually got a knot in my stomach as Shelby holds his cocked gun to Normans head.  For a full minute I think he really may shoot, until I rationally realized that Norman is the only one who actually has to survive this show.  Norma gets Shelby away from her son, but as Shelby starts to beat her up things get intense.  We start to see the world from Normans psycho point of view, as he gets that look in his eyes that tells you he is gone.  His vision begins to blur, his ears begin to ring, and before we know it, Norman has knocked Shelby to the ground, hitting his own head in the process.  As Norman lays unconscious (from both the blow to the head and his psycho moment) a gunfight breaks out between Shelby and Dylan.

As the firefight between Shelby and Dylan rages, each man getting shot in the process, Norma is able to drag Norman out to the car, but not before calling the cops.  Dylan nearly kills Shelby, his own psycho look in his eyes, but he runs out of ammo. Dylan runs up to his room to reload, and Shelby follows him up the infamous Psycho staircase.  Meanwhile, Norma has gotten Norman in the car, but Norman is just not there.  As Norma freaks out that she left the keys inside, Norman just stares blankly.  BOOM, BOOM, BOOM.  The world freezes.  Who has won the gunfight?  A shadow passes through the front door, and Norma (and myself) tries to see who the staggering figure is.  It could easily be Dylan or Shelby... FUCK ITS SHELBY!  But wait.. where's his eye?  And just before he is able to shoot Norma dead, Shelby keels over and dies.  Thankfully, Dylan is okay and Dylan and Norma have a mother/son moment as he whispers to her that she is now safe.

Norma wonders out loud what they should tell the cops, and Dylan says "the truth."  But Norma scolds him, telling him that he doesn't know the truth, that he has no idea what the truth is.  And you feel it coming, that moment we've all been waiting for... the truth about Norman's father's death.  Oh it's so sweet.  We flashback, Norma and Norman's father are fighting.  Norman starts to get that look, and when Daddy starts hitting Mommy, Norman smashes his brains in with a blender.  Norma puts Norman in his room and stages the whole thing to look like an accident.  That bitch is good at cover-ups.  She should have been in the FBI.  Anyway, the entire opening scene is replayed as we see Norman devastated over his dad's death, having no clue that he caused it.  Now, I had written earlier that I thought Norman may have killed his dad, but it doesn't stop the whole thing from being totally tragic.

Dylan is appropriately horrified.  He asks Norma what's wrong with him, but she admits she doesn't know.  The reason she holds him so close is to protect him, just in case he ever did something like that again.  She gives Dylan an ultimatum as the cops come, you either help, or get out of the way.

THIS SHOW IS SO GOOD!  Unfortunately, the question I posed in my earlier post (Did Norman actually unknowingly rape Bradley http://thedefinitionofnerd.blogspot.com/2013/04/a-pre-bates-motel-theory.html ) wasn't answered, but with all we learned about Norman this week, it's a strong possibility.

Bates Motel: Ocean View (spoilers)

Oh gosh, I need a Klonopin after every episode of this show because IT MAKES ME SO NERVOUS!  I mean, I know that's the point, but my God, I'm going to have a stroke.  Literally every moment is charged, even if it isn't with tension.  Every shot is precise, ever facial expression well thought out, this my friends is good TV.

The episode starts with Norman leaving Bradley after their night of passion.  As she sleeps, Norman gives us some super creepy post-coital hover hand, then walking home with some pep in his step.  But before Norman can start singing "Zippidy Doo Dah" Dylan drops the bomb that Norma was arrested.  Well fuck, there goes his buzz.

The boys visit Mother in jail where she serves passion aggression hard.  Even as Norman begs to help, he gets nothing but the cold shoulder, and now that she knows Dylan knows everything she looks like she is about to burst with hatred.  Norman pleads with her, telling her he will put the motel up as collateral, but she just ignores him.  Vera Farmiga has created a sly monster.  There is something that consistently irks you about her, but she stays just on the bubble of normal to confuse you.  Is she being passive aggressive on purpose or does she really believe her own crap?

While Norman searches for the deed, Emma comes over to extend her condolences about Mama Bates' arrest.  Norman finds the deed and Emma drives him in her adorable, very vintage bright orange VW Bug.  While they wait for the bond office to open, Norman tells Emma about finding one of the Asian prostitutes in a cop's house.  Emma freaks out and starts to ramble about how to help her, but Norman won't do a thing until Mom's out of jail.  Before she leaves, Emma kisses Norman in a cutesy, flirty, adorable way, but Norman just gets really awkward about it.

Well, Norman isn't the only one trying to get money.  Dylan asks his partner, Ethan about getting some money in advance.  Ethan warns against it, I mean, they did just set somebody on fire and tie them to a flag pole.... but when Dylan explains that all he wants is to move himself and his brother into a more stable environment Ethan softens.

As Norman tries in vain to reach Bradley, he gets the bail money and gets Mom out.  He goes to the jail with flowers, but Norma blows him off in the coldest way possible, giving him nothing but anger and guilt.  Her coldness hurts ME and she isn't even my mother... hell she isn't even real!  Anyhow, they end up at a lawyers office...  AND OH MY GOD NORMAN STARTS EATING CANDY FROM HER DESK!  I LOVE seeing these bits and pieces of the Psycho villain coming through.  Anyhoo, when Norma's lawyer starts talking self defense plea, Norma goes ape-shit screaming that she didn't do it... and you start to wonder... does she believe she's innocent?

During the car ride home, Norman finally grows a pair and confronts Mother, but Norma puts it all out there.  While she sat in her room, bawling and scared of being arrested, Norman went out and got LAID, and she blames Dylan for letting him go.  When Norman tells his mother that he is afraid of her and the way she acts sometimes.  Norma literally pulls him out of the car 10 miles from their home... Luckily, Dylan comes riding in on his motorcycle to save the day.  We get some beautiful cinematography as the brothers drive home.  Dylan tells Norman that he thinks that Norma is addicted to drama.  Dylan wants Norman to move in with him, to finally cut the cord, but Norman wont leave his Mom... the closer Dylan and Norman get, the more I fear for Dylan's life.

But, Dylan is still serious about getting his own place, and when his partner Ethan gives him 5 grand of his own money, Dylan is truly touched.  Ethan says he's happy to help, and that he knows Dylan is good for the money...  but then... HOLY FUCKING SHIT!  SOME JUNKY UP AND SHOOTS ETHAN IN THE FUCKING NECK!  WHAT THE HELL?!  WHY DID THAT JUST HAPPEN!!!???  Dylan rushes his buddy to the hospital, but quickly bails before he gets involved with the cops.  Wut.

Norma sketchily meets with Shelby.  He apologizes for arresting her, but he gets the full Norma fridged bitch routine.  It isn't until she storms out of his car that he manhandles Norma, but when he confesses his love for her, she melts   He promises to fix this... and he does!  He goes to the station and sneaks around stealing the carpet fibers that make the case.  Well, either Norma is an excellent fuck or something is going on because it doesn't seem worth risking his career for a women he hardly knows... WHAT IS GOING ON!?

As Shelby gets himself into some deep shit, Dylan is driving around town in shock, his buddies blood still drying on his shirt.  As he drives, shell shocked, he finds the junkie who shot his buddy.  Here is how my notes on the show literally read as I was watching:  oh shit oh shit oh shit he... HE RUNS HIM OVER!!!! WHAT IS WITH THIS FAMILY!?  WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!?  OH GOD THOSE CRAZY EYES!

Meanwhile, at the Bates home, Norma gets the phone call that exonerates her, they lost the fiber sample, she is saved.  She runs to Norman who has just finished leaving the most awkward message on Bradley's phone... AND OH MY GOD HE HAS A BAG OF CANDY!  Norma decides to forgive Norman as they rejoice in her new found innocence... but there is a catch, Norma tells Norman the Shelby is the reason she's in the clear... But Norman just sees this as another way for Shelby to manipulate this family and storms out.

Emma picked a good time to show up, Norman gets in her car and asks her to drive him anywhere away from the motel.  Emma tells Norman that she thinks she knows where the sex slave might be.  She did some research with the assumption that the cop (who she doesn't know is Shelby) was in cahoots with Keith in the motel/sex trade business.  She is about to give the location of the girl when Norman blurts out that he slept with Bradley.  Emma gets really upset, insisting it was just a hook up, but Norman gets her back on the sex slave route.  She tells him that the girl is probably on Keith's boat.

So... they go to Keith's boat and here are my literal notes:  AHHH WHY DO THEY THINK THIS IS A GOOD IDEA AND I AM FREAKING OUT AND WHY IS THIS HAPPENING AND I AM SO SCARED!  ASIAN GIRL POPS OUT OF THE CLOSET!  AND I AM DYING AND MY HEART IS POUNDING WHY!!!!!!

So they find the girl and bring her back to the motel.  As they help her, Norma stumbles upon this weird situation, trying to deny Shelby has anything to do with this.  Norma shoves a picture of Shelby in the poor girls face, and she admits everything, Shelby did this to her.  And Oh shit, now we know why Shelby is helping Norma... because it they really investigate Keith's death, they may stumble upon this whole sex ring.

Shit Just Got Real.  I am in love with this show.

Bates Motel: If You're Not Watching This Show, You Should Be

This is the kind of tension you just don't get on TV anymore!  A heart pounding thriller that needs little blood, nearly no gore or extreme violence to prove it's point.  Seriously in the first 5 minutes of this weeks episode "Trust Me" had my heart racing, but all of it was done with the delicacy of Alfred Hitchcock.  So little entertainment now-a-days doesn't shove sex and gore and CGI and blood in your face.  This show has sex and violence but none of it is over the top.  We just see enough to get our emotions to peak and leave us wanting more.

This weeks episode starts where last weeks ended.  Norman is doing his creepy Psycho walk to Shelby's house to get the belt he took from Keith when they dumped his body.

During last weeks episode, we saw a motorcycle drive by, it looked to just be for artistic effect, but in actuality it was Dylan.  Dylan sees Norman sneak into Shelby's house, and provides distraction for Norman to get out.  Little does he know that Norman is being clawed by a drugged up sex slave in the basement, but Norman gets out with just a few scratches.  Dylan calls Norman out on his actions later, but Norman denies, denies, denies.  It's becoming hard to figure out what Norman believes verses what he's made up.

Norman goes to visit Emma, to tell her what he's seen, but her father comes to the door.  Oh, hello Professor Quirrell, it's weird to see you without Voldemort on the back of your head.  Glad to see you got that cleared up.  Anyway, Emma's father tells Norman that she is sick and can't be seen.  He then goes on to tell Norman that he knows Emma has a crush on him, so Norman needs to be respectful.  Norman promises.  Meanwhile, poor Bradley's dad has passed.  She begins spending more and more time with Norman as she feels he is the one person who understands how she feels.  LOOOVVVEEE TRIANGLE!!!

Anyway, the show becomes a lot of set up from here on in, but I was happy to watch because I know this is the kind of show where every interaction, every shot has a purpose.  Basically, Norma is still screwing Shelby.  Norman begs her to stop in the creepiest scene ever, even defending his jealousy of his mom's new relationship with, "You're my mother not my girlfriend!"  Norman goes as far as to tell his mother about the sex slave, but when Norma checks out the situation she finds nothing.  She explains to Norman that he sometimes sees things, but Norman won't hear it.  So what does Norma make her possibly totally insane son do?  Go FISHING with the one guy Norman would potentially try to kill, Shelby.

Tension builds throughout the episode, "Oh God, Oh God," became my mantra as Shelby tries to bond with Norman over fishing.  It's awkward and painful to watch and just as Norman's face starts to turn Psycho, Shelby gets a phone call.

You know they found Keith's body and your heart is pounding.  It turns out only to be his hand, but its enough to make you wish you were dead.

Norma get's taken in for questioning again.  Turns out they found carpet fibers under Keith's watch which they will be able to match to the carpet Norma threw out.  Norma tries in vain to get those carpets back, but she knows she's screwed and spends most of the rest of the episode crying.  Norman screams at her, telling her that she should have just called the cops like he said, but she admits that killing Keith wasn't self defense. Norma's been through some shit, it's obvious her back story is an epic one and I cannot wait to hear it.

As Norma weeps away in her room, Norman storms outside to find Dylan drinking and smoking.  They have some brotherly bonding as Norman confesses everything that happened with Keith and Norma.  In a touching moment, Norman takes a shot of whisky and coughs on it.  When Dylan giggles Norman says in the most wounded voice ever "Don't laugh at me."  After Norman gets the murder off his chest, Bradley texts him.  Dylan convinces Norman to go be with Bradley.  And then...

******NORMAN GETS LAID!!!!!******

With some beautiful blue filtered cinematography we find Norman and Bradley under the covers.  Okay so we don't know if that actually were having sex, but that's what was implied so I'm going with it.  I'm really surprised at the choice of getting Norman laid, but I'm sure somehow Norma will psychologically torture him about it.

At the end of the episode, Norma realizes that Norman isn't home.  Dylan tells her that Norman is out with a girl and he hopes he's getting laid.  She freaks the fuck out.  But she doesn't have time to get too upset because SHE FUCKING GETS ARRESTED FOR MURDER.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WHY IS THIS SHOW SO GOOD!!!???

Bates Motel: Trust Me (spoilers)

Oh, this show!  I'm just loving it!  Okay I know this post is a day late, but I just had to blog about it because this show is just too good not to.  In last night's episode "Trust Me" we were given a lot of info in one episode, but luckily they pulled it all off without jumping the shark.  The Norman Bates from Psycho is really starting to shine and boy is Freddie Highmore a delight to watch.

Last night's episode starts with Dylan fooling around with a gun.  It's pretty obvious that he will be working for the drug lords that are tending the enormous weed field that Norman and Emma ran into in the last episode.  At the weed field, he stands guard (which really consists of drinking beers) he bonds with his fellow guard.  They hunt and chat.  Dylan explains the weird relationship with his family, including that he literally knows nothing about his mother or half-brother.  It is then explained that the burning body was just one of the men involved with the marijuana trade who was there to send a message.  Kind of boring but whatever.

Meanwhile, Norman goes to school, acting totally normal as if in the last week he didn't help cover up a murder and then get chased by drug lords.  Well, Emma isn't as together as Norman is and freaks out threatening to go to the police with the book.  Suddenly cool calm collected Norman snaps and practically screams at Emma, he will not let her go to the police.  He apologizes but he is obviously shaken after their encounter.  While in class, Norman seems totally out of it.  He stares at the test sitting in front of him, totally motionless and LORD is it creepy.  Miss Sexy Teacher leans over Norman, asking if he's okay, but Norman is in another world as he pictures Miss Watson as one of the women tied up and tortured from the book.  And then he passes out.

Norman ends up in the hospital and mother is FREAKING OUT!  The doctor keeps trying to get information from her, but it seems Norma is incapable of telling the truth.  When the doctor asks if this has ever happened to Norman before Norma gives him a blank look but quickly denies it wondering why the doctor would even ask a question like that.  But, we know this is a lie.  The first time we even meet Norman he is passed out, waking up groggy from some sort of episode.  Now we have to wonder... was it Norman who killed his father?  OooOoooOooo.

While waiting for tests to come back, Norma gets a phone call that the new carpet for the motel has arrived.  Norman encourages her to go.  Norma agrees and goes back home... and it seems the cops follow her because they burst in with a search warrant.  Well shit.

Back at the hospital, Norman gets a visit from the beautiful Bradley who has brought him flowers.  They talk about what it's like to lose a parent, though her father isn't dead yet, it doesn't look good.  She snuggles up next to Norman in his hospital bed and whispers that all she wants is to be happy.

While the cops continue to search the Bates Motel, Norma runs back to the hospital.  When she walks into the room she has a horrified expression, and the audience hearts collectively  drops into their asses as we all fear that Bradley is still snuggling with Norman, but thank GOD it's just the doctor to explain the tests are negative.  Despite the doctors urging to keep Norman overnight, Norma quickly shuffles him out, explaining to Norman the the cops are searching their place.  Norman FREAKS OUT asking her over and over again if they found anything, but Norma insists there is nothing to find.  When they get home Norman runs upstairs... you see.. he kept the BELT...  when he realizes it's gone he weeps asking "What's wrong with me" over and over".  What the hell is wrong with you!  WHY WOULD YOU KEEP THAT!?  Oh, Norman.

Norma, thankfully, is able to finagle a meeting with Shelby.  She goes to his house and he explains that he found the belt.  He asks Norma to explain, but he promises to protect her as they start making out.  Norman, however is home freaking out that Mother isn't home.  Dylan does come home, and after his conversation with his fellow guard decided to try to bond with Norman, and then this happens:

NORMAN DOESN'T REMEMBER TRYING TO KILL DYLAN!  OH SHIT!  HE IS BLACKING OUT!  NORMA MUST KNOW!

Later Norma comes home and explains that Shelby will protect them.  All seems like it will be ok... until while Norman is asleep Norma comes back and blames it all on Norman.  She tells him he knows he has to do.  "I have to get the belt".  Norman walks to Shelby, giving us full face serial killer realness.  GOD does Highmore nail it.  He looks around the house in a high tension scene and comes across what we never expect.... one of ties up Asian girls in his basement:

Norman asks her is shes okay just as Shelby pulls up and BOOM!  The episode ends!

OH.  MY.  GOD.  Norman is already displaying a multi-personality disorder.  How long can Norma protect him.  And it makes you wonder... is the drugged up girl in the basement real?  Or is she a figure of Norman's disillusions... I CANNOT WAIT to find out the answer.

Nice Town You Picked Norma: Bates Motel Episode 2 (spoilers)

So tonight was episode two of A&E's new show Bates Motel.  Now after the first episode I was left on the fence.  The show is quite entertaining, well directed, well acted and even well written, but as I said in my last post, the show has a lot to live up to.  We're talking Psycho here, one of the greatest horror/suspense films of all time directed by the most famous horror/suspense movie director of all time Alfred Hitchcock.  That's taking on a lot... especially when modernizing it.  But I have to say I find the show is sucking me in, even if I want to judge it against Psycho.

The opening scene was fantastic.  We see Norman looking at the creepy anime-esque book he found in one of the rooms.  He is looking at a shower scene while clicking a flashlight on and off.  Brilliant use of foreshadow, forever reminding the audience of the life this character is going to lead, which is smart on the part of the director.  The modernness of the show could throw people off, we must constantly be reminded of who Norman Bates is going to become.

Anyway, as Norman is being creepy his brother Dylan shows up and brings high tension even higher.  He keeps calling his mother "Norma" and making it clear that he hates her.  Even Norman seems to hate his brother, storming off to the bus stop after exchanging un-pleasantries with Dylan.  Breaking from the plot for a moment, I have to commend Freddie Highmore on his mannerisms as Bates.  He has a great awkward stiffness  even when he walks I just adore it.  There is something about the way he sets his shoulders that really gets me... I really see Norman.

He meets Bradley at the bus stop and then we see a personable Norman.  I wonder if that is a trait Norman will shake off as the seasons go by because Bates in the movie is almost always awkward around people, seeming to want to jump out of his skin at the sight of another person.  But with Bradley he is very kind and very nearly warm.

Anyhow as they wait for the bus a car comes careening in.  One of the girls thinks the driver is drunk, but Bradly realizes its her dad's car as he crashes.  Norman rips the car door open, but instead of seeing and inebriated man, we see Bradly's dad really really badly burned.  What the fuck?  Turns out he owns a warehouse and somebody set fire to it.  Norma and Dylan stand around the accident and you can't help but feel like Dylan did it.  There is no evidence of that, but it's just a weird feeling I had.

As the accident is being investigated, the car of the man Norma killed is found.  Vera is FANTASTIC in this scene you can see the fear in her eyes as Sheriff Romeo basically accuses her then and there.  She stumbles and is all over the place as she is berated with questions and the tension builds and builds until you want to jump out a window.  Awesome.

Norma asks Dylan to go pick up linens but he ends up at a strip club.  As he watches the half naked women dance he notices a man crying.  At first the weepy man gets defensive, but quickly changes his tune admitting that Bradley's dad was his boss and he is broken up about what has happened.  Feeling bad, he pays for Dylan's drink with a buttload of cash.  Dylan asks where the money came from, and later on in the episode gets caught up in some shady business.  Not sure what it is yet, but he was asked if he knew how to use a gun.  Dun Dun Dunnnnn.  Also as a side note, we find out Dylan is not actually Norman's full brother but his half brother.  Norma left Dylan's father for Norman's.  More, DUN DUN DUNNNNSSSS.

So, even after seeing a man nearly burned to death in his car, Norman goes to school.  Alright.  He get's paired up with Emma (the girl with CF) and she comes over after school.  Now this scene was ah-mah-zing.  When Emma goes to Norman's house for the the project she walks in on Norman and Norma scrubbing the kitchen.  It isn't really that weird as long as you are blind to the fact that they are trying to erase all evidence of a man being stabbed to death there.  Amazing, wonderful, uber-talented Vera gives us NORMA BATES.  This is the woman who makes her son a psycho   The way she questions Emma about everything from her last name to her life expectancy is insane.  It was just words but I literally got the goosebumps I was so creeped out.  Oh, so good.  And when Dylan jokes about them making out the look on Norma's face... oh my God so good.  I can't.  I can't.

Emma and Norman have a pretty boring scene.  As Emma waxes poetic she finds Norman's book.  Emma falls in love with it (it WAS Manga!) and takes it home with her.

The next cut is really weird as we find Norma sexily putting on lotion.  We find she has a pretty intense scar on her thigh.  Her eyes linger on it and we can see her reliving some moment until the doorbell rings.  Norma finds the cops at the door and Sheriff Romero really railroads her.  Norma gets caught in some of her lies and the scene is so intense I am nearly brought to tears.  Norma takes to flirting with Deputy Shelby who takes her for coffee and a very 60s looking dinner that I ADORED it looked like something that was in psycho.  Shelby round-a-boutly asks Norma to the most Hick sounding festival of all time.

Norma gets dolled up for her date that's not a date and sort of flounces around Norman.  Norman is not happy about her going on a date even if she assures him that she is just doing it to protect them from suspicion.  Norman then proceeds to change her shirt in front of her son and he gets really weird about it.  I mean, like, turned on.  Norma reads it as awkwardness and remarks "I'm your mother, it's not like it's weird or anything," BUT YES ITS FUCKING WEIRD.  They then sit in the bed and a swear they are about to kiss and I am dying and I am loving this show.  Soooo creepy soooo good.

While Norma is at the fair, Dylan comes home as Norman is heating up dinner.  Dylan's phone rings and Norman sees that "The Whore" is calling.  Turns out the whore is Mom.  Norman freaks out and comes at Dylan but isn't able to overpower his big half-brother.  When Dylan turns away Norman... well... GOES FUCKING PSYCHO RUNNING AT HIM WITH A FUCKING MALLET!  HE IS GOING TO KILL HIM!  HOLY SHIT, HOLY SHIT!  But, whew, Dylan steps out of the way just in time and cold cocks his brother.  "She's not a whore." Norman mumbles on the ground.   OOOoooooooo.

Norma sees Norman's bruise and promises to kick Dylan out.  Norman gets an urgent text from Emma and goes to her father's shop to meet her.  Norman walks through the taxidermy shop and... OH SHIT I JUST REALIZED TAXIDERMY OH FUCK.  That's literally how I reacted mid-scene.  Well Norman had to get into it somehow.  Anyway it turns out Emma has translated Norman's book and thinks its a true story about sex slaves from Japan and wants to find the body of one of the girls who was killed and buried in the mountains.  Then she out of the blue kisses Norman, stares at him intently and moves on.  Norman looks over the moon.

So here is where I get kind of unhappy with the episode.  Norman and Emma go to the mountain where they think one of the sex slaves may be buried   Emma can't keep up, panting and coughing but she insists on finding this body.  Unfortunately they stumble across a weed field and are forced to run from men with guns.  This is not the type of tension i want from this show, Psycho deserves something more psychological not a chase scene with guns and a girl who can't breath.  I can watch Person of Interest for that kind of tension.

The final image we are left with is everybody in the town moving like a hoard of zombies.  Norma is in her car and their is a crowd gathering in front of her as cops move traffic forward.  There is a burning body is hanging upside down from a flag post.  Norma has a panic attack.  WHO IS THE BURNNING MAN!? WTF IS HAPPENING IN THE TOWN!

Okay Bates Motel.  You got me.  Let's do this.  Just no more chase scenes okay?