Bates Motel: Ocean View (spoilers)

Oh gosh, I need a Klonopin after every episode of this show because IT MAKES ME SO NERVOUS!  I mean, I know that's the point, but my God, I'm going to have a stroke.  Literally every moment is charged, even if it isn't with tension.  Every shot is precise, ever facial expression well thought out, this my friends is good TV.

The episode starts with Norman leaving Bradley after their night of passion.  As she sleeps, Norman gives us some super creepy post-coital hover hand, then walking home with some pep in his step.  But before Norman can start singing "Zippidy Doo Dah" Dylan drops the bomb that Norma was arrested.  Well fuck, there goes his buzz.

The boys visit Mother in jail where she serves passion aggression hard.  Even as Norman begs to help, he gets nothing but the cold shoulder, and now that she knows Dylan knows everything she looks like she is about to burst with hatred.  Norman pleads with her, telling her he will put the motel up as collateral, but she just ignores him.  Vera Farmiga has created a sly monster.  There is something that consistently irks you about her, but she stays just on the bubble of normal to confuse you.  Is she being passive aggressive on purpose or does she really believe her own crap?

While Norman searches for the deed, Emma comes over to extend her condolences about Mama Bates' arrest.  Norman finds the deed and Emma drives him in her adorable, very vintage bright orange VW Bug.  While they wait for the bond office to open, Norman tells Emma about finding one of the Asian prostitutes in a cop's house.  Emma freaks out and starts to ramble about how to help her, but Norman won't do a thing until Mom's out of jail.  Before she leaves, Emma kisses Norman in a cutesy, flirty, adorable way, but Norman just gets really awkward about it.

Well, Norman isn't the only one trying to get money.  Dylan asks his partner, Ethan about getting some money in advance.  Ethan warns against it, I mean, they did just set somebody on fire and tie them to a flag pole.... but when Dylan explains that all he wants is to move himself and his brother into a more stable environment Ethan softens.

As Norman tries in vain to reach Bradley, he gets the bail money and gets Mom out.  He goes to the jail with flowers, but Norma blows him off in the coldest way possible, giving him nothing but anger and guilt.  Her coldness hurts ME and she isn't even my mother... hell she isn't even real!  Anyhow, they end up at a lawyers office...  AND OH MY GOD NORMAN STARTS EATING CANDY FROM HER DESK!  I LOVE seeing these bits and pieces of the Psycho villain coming through.  Anyhoo, when Norma's lawyer starts talking self defense plea, Norma goes ape-shit screaming that she didn't do it... and you start to wonder... does she believe she's innocent?

During the car ride home, Norman finally grows a pair and confronts Mother, but Norma puts it all out there.  While she sat in her room, bawling and scared of being arrested, Norman went out and got LAID, and she blames Dylan for letting him go.  When Norman tells his mother that he is afraid of her and the way she acts sometimes.  Norma literally pulls him out of the car 10 miles from their home... Luckily, Dylan comes riding in on his motorcycle to save the day.  We get some beautiful cinematography as the brothers drive home.  Dylan tells Norman that he thinks that Norma is addicted to drama.  Dylan wants Norman to move in with him, to finally cut the cord, but Norman wont leave his Mom... the closer Dylan and Norman get, the more I fear for Dylan's life.

But, Dylan is still serious about getting his own place, and when his partner Ethan gives him 5 grand of his own money, Dylan is truly touched.  Ethan says he's happy to help, and that he knows Dylan is good for the money...  but then... HOLY FUCKING SHIT!  SOME JUNKY UP AND SHOOTS ETHAN IN THE FUCKING NECK!  WHAT THE HELL?!  WHY DID THAT JUST HAPPEN!!!???  Dylan rushes his buddy to the hospital, but quickly bails before he gets involved with the cops.  Wut.

Norma sketchily meets with Shelby.  He apologizes for arresting her, but he gets the full Norma fridged bitch routine.  It isn't until she storms out of his car that he manhandles Norma, but when he confesses his love for her, she melts   He promises to fix this... and he does!  He goes to the station and sneaks around stealing the carpet fibers that make the case.  Well, either Norma is an excellent fuck or something is going on because it doesn't seem worth risking his career for a women he hardly knows... WHAT IS GOING ON!?

As Shelby gets himself into some deep shit, Dylan is driving around town in shock, his buddies blood still drying on his shirt.  As he drives, shell shocked, he finds the junkie who shot his buddy.  Here is how my notes on the show literally read as I was watching:  oh shit oh shit oh shit he... HE RUNS HIM OVER!!!! WHAT IS WITH THIS FAMILY!?  WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!?  OH GOD THOSE CRAZY EYES!

Meanwhile, at the Bates home, Norma gets the phone call that exonerates her, they lost the fiber sample, she is saved.  She runs to Norman who has just finished leaving the most awkward message on Bradley's phone... AND OH MY GOD HE HAS A BAG OF CANDY!  Norma decides to forgive Norman as they rejoice in her new found innocence... but there is a catch, Norma tells Norman the Shelby is the reason she's in the clear... But Norman just sees this as another way for Shelby to manipulate this family and storms out.

Emma picked a good time to show up, Norman gets in her car and asks her to drive him anywhere away from the motel.  Emma tells Norman that she thinks she knows where the sex slave might be.  She did some research with the assumption that the cop (who she doesn't know is Shelby) was in cahoots with Keith in the motel/sex trade business.  She is about to give the location of the girl when Norman blurts out that he slept with Bradley.  Emma gets really upset, insisting it was just a hook up, but Norman gets her back on the sex slave route.  She tells him that the girl is probably on Keith's boat.

So... they go to Keith's boat and here are my literal notes:  AHHH WHY DO THEY THINK THIS IS A GOOD IDEA AND I AM FREAKING OUT AND WHY IS THIS HAPPENING AND I AM SO SCARED!  ASIAN GIRL POPS OUT OF THE CLOSET!  AND I AM DYING AND MY HEART IS POUNDING WHY!!!!!!

So they find the girl and bring her back to the motel.  As they help her, Norma stumbles upon this weird situation, trying to deny Shelby has anything to do with this.  Norma shoves a picture of Shelby in the poor girls face, and she admits everything, Shelby did this to her.  And Oh shit, now we know why Shelby is helping Norma... because it they really investigate Keith's death, they may stumble upon this whole sex ring.

Shit Just Got Real.  I am in love with this show.