American Horror Story: Head

I've been a TOTAL blog slacker the last few weeks, I mean, I didn't even blog about Doctor Who's 50th, but that may have been because I had an emotional breakdown.  Well, I'm back tonight, giving my live reaction's to American Horror Story.  Now, the show is starting to hit that moment where it will peak in glory or become totally un-watchable.  That being said, if they bring one more person back to life I am going to be so over it.  As Myrtle put it "She's brought more people back to life than Jesus Christ!"  I'm just saying, Jesus only brought like, one person back to life, and the bible is still a roaring huge hit, no need to beat a dead horse and then bring it back to life AHS.

On anther note, the people in my office have a bit of a bet going on who will be Supreme, and currently Nan is in the lead.  I was all "Team Misty" but now that Myrtle thinks she's the next supreme I think she may be out.  I mean, last episode Nan did open the door with her mind AND she was with Madison when she set the curtains on fire.  Who said it was Madison who did it?  Obviously, they are setting it up so that everybody looks like they could be the Supreme.  I just hope it doesn't end up being totally lame.  Okay, here we go:

• Head?  What an odd title.
• OOooh A witch hunting trip.  Of 1700s... in 1991?
• Enter world's most stereotypical looking witch, "NEVER FORGET WHAT THEY ARE!"
• That guy just shot that witch to death with his damn arm on fire.  That's commitment.
• Damn, that's a good wig Fiona.  Because really it's just your real hair.... 

I can clock a wig at 10 yards, girl that's yo hair

• The makeup effects this season are the best yet.  Loving rotting LaLaurie.
• How can she talk?  Her head is in a box.  WHAT'S IN THE BOX!  That's all I keep thinking.
• Can somebody just give Angela Bassett all the awards that there are?

• How is burning her head going to kill her?  It's fucking not even attached to her body!  How is air going through?  No, this magic can't explain away.
• Myrtle Snow, best costume ever.
• So witch hunting has gone corporate?  The fuq
• This witch hunting scene is the most boring scene ever.
• We get it, his hand is burned, how many close ups do wee need?
• Oh God, a MELLON BALLER.  These bitches are losing eyes.

Scariest weapon of all.

• "Power Compassion and Uniqueness."  What is this?  RuPaul's Drag Race.
• "Monk's Hood in your balls."  Balls, head, what is going on here?
• Frances Conroy your a God Damned genius.
• OH FUCK A NUT I WAS SO HOPING THEY WOULDN'T SHOW THAT.
• Fucking finally!  Everybody is giving people life, and healing dead babies and what not, but it took THIS LONG for somebody to heal Cordelia!  You ladies dropped the ball.  And you gave her miss matched eyes on top of it.  Poor Cordelia, your husband hates witches, your eyes be crazy and you have serious mommy issues.  Here, a pity party for you:

I can't have a baby and somebody threw acid in my face and my husband is a witch hunter and my mom killed a bunch of people and I don't like to use my magic, and I was blind and now my eyes don't match.

• There is a LOT of dismemberment this season.  I'm just sad Leslie Jordan is dead :(
• Okay, so now she's not blind she has lost her second sight.  Boohoo.
• What in GODS NAME is Madison wearing on her head!  She looks like a beefeater.

• Does Joan not know she was dead?
• Oh man, his whispering into Nan's ear was pretty HOT!
• This is Patty Fucking-LuPone!  Let her SING!!!  Ugh.  You do not waste Miss LuPone's talent on a crying sing!  You belt that bible shit.
• Severed head Kathy Bates is fucking genius.  Whoever's idea that was, I love you.
• I only just realized why this is called "Head."
• I love that Cordelia is teaching Misty.... like they are sisters!  It's like Practical Magic!!
• OH SNAP!  He was the one who tried to kill Misty.
• Where the hell did that dog come from.  What a weird transition.  
• OH SNAP!  Fiona found....WAIT DID HE JUST EAT THE DOG?
• Luke is a hottie hot hottie.
• What a fucked up way to kill somebody, beed to death.
• FUCK YES!!!!!  KYLE IS NOT THE FRANKENSTEIN MONSTER ANYMORE!!!

• HOLY SHIT BALLS!!! HE WENT AFTER THE VOODOO GIRLS!!!
• OH SHIT QUEENIE GOT IT IN THE TUMMY!!!!  RIGHT IN HER HOLD MINOTAUR WOUND!
• YEAH QUEENIE YOU CRAWL YOURSELF AND BE A HERO!  O MAN O GOD!!! THAT WAS EPIC!  I was like, WHY IS SHE KILLING HERSELF!  But she is a VOODOO DOLL!  OH MAN THAT WAS EPIC. YES.  YES. YES!
• Oh, come on, you knew LuPone was going to kill her son.
• Oh yes, an unholy alliance!  I like where this is heading!!!

To be fair, with all the witch hunter business I was nervous about this episode, but it was PERFECT!  So HAPPY!!!