Dead Rising on American TV

Nope, I'm not talking zombies, I am talking TV and it's new trend of killing pretty much anyone.  If you haven't watched the following shows (and plan to) READ NO FURTHER:  Person of Interest, Game of Thrones, Doctor Who, Boardwalk Empire, Being Human (The UK version) or read The Divergent Series.

Okay are all you guys out?  Last chance.

Good.  So last night, I, a huge J.J. Abram's fan, was settling in to watch Person of Interest.  Well, for me this season has been a bit of "Person of no interest at all whatsoever".  I was starting to find the plot tired, the characters tired and I was considering cutting the show from my epic TV schedule.  But, I was impressed with last week's episode of Detective Carter pretty much single handedly taking down the corrupt cops of HR.  I was down to watch last night's episode to see how the plot would thicken, the previews leading me to believe it would be the end for Detective Fusco.  I had mentally prepared myself for the loss of one of my favorite characters, but when he freed himself from a bad situation, I was overjoyed.

Then again, this is network TV.  Nobody ever actually dies.  I mean, you kind of know it, don't you?  The most shocking death I can remember on network in the last few years is when they killed Kal Penn off of House, but then again we knew that he would be leaving when he took a job at the White House.  So, when Fusco didn't take a bullet to the brain, I was slightly relieved but not too surprised... however, in the final seconds of the show, just when we think we are out of the woods, a payphone rings with a new number and CARTER IS SHOT TO DEATH!

Now, to be fair, I have always felt that Taraji P. Henson was too good for this show.  Not that the show isn't wonderful, it's just that she is such an amazing actress with a RANGE, a tough cop character was not enough for her, in my opinion.  She is an incredible actress who I truly fell in love with in her her Oscar nominated role in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.  But the second Harold heard that payphone ring I knew it was either curtains for John or Carter, thinking it may be John after his number had already come up and Root had hinted at Harold losing other partners.  But no, when corrupt HR 2nd in command Simmons finds the two, he hits Carter who was defending weaponless John.  And since I was so used to Network close calls I was waiting for the miracle, for the ambulances, for the emergency room OR scene, but none of those things came.  Carter was dead.

Well, lots of fans out there may be angry or upset but I am overjoyed.  Of course I am sad to see Henson leave, but the networks are FINALLY catching on to what cable networks/BBC have already discovered.  When nobody is safe, people will watch.  For God's sake, BBC's Being Human killed off every single main character, poor Nina not even getting an onscreen death, and people STILL watched.

And your little wolf too.

It seems like this new trend on American TV started with shows like The Walking Dead, and HBO's Game of Thrones, who killed Ned Stark the apparent main character in the first season.  And let's not forget this years Red Wedding (pictured above) which had fans declaring they would never watch the show again.  To be fair, both of these are based on books, but when Boardwalk Empire abruptly killed main character Jimmy despite his widening character arc, people were shocked.  But the value in these deaths is that the audience gets an adrenaline rush every time they watch the show.  Nobody is safe, not the main character, not your favorite character.  Nobody.  And isn't that real life?!  Cop/fire fighters/soldiers husbands and wives worry everyday for the safety of their loved ones.  It's not like TV where you know they will survive because they are  the main character or "the good guy."

Now, as a Doctor Who fan I should be used to character favorites dying (most recently Rory, Amy, River Song and shortly #11), I should know better that just because it's for "kids" doesn't mean people are safe.  Having just finished the Divergent series I surprisingly left angry as (SPOILER) THE main character Tris died within the last few chapters.  "THIS IS YA!"  I practically screamed, "HOW COULD THEY!"  But, this was the wrong way to look at it.  I should say "BRAVO!  This is REAL!" just like I do with TV, but then again, I think you get a little more invested with books.  So shame on me.  I will be interested to see how moviegoers who did not read the book react when the final film comes out.

So now it will be interesting to see if any other networks follow suit.  Just because somebody is in the poster, doesn't mean they can't die, in fact, in many action shows it's impractical.  So, BRAVO POI, while I am so, so sad to see Carter go I think it's a step in the direction of more interesting American TV.

Being Human: The Last Broadcast... Literally (Spoilers)

UGGGHHHHHH!  First they take away Fringe, then they give me a shit season of American Horror Story and then... THEN Toby Whithouse has the audacity to end Being Human.  What is a nerd girl to do!  I'm dead, inside I died.  Dead.  I am heartbroken.  In the appropriately named The Last Broadcast we see the end of the Vampire, Werewolf, Ghost trinity forever.  Unless you want to knuckle under and watch the American version... which I will not be doing.  All and all I was hoping for something better, I was more in love with last weeks' episode, but I wasn't prepared for Inception like plot twists going in and now I feel my brain slowly leaking out my ear.  Here's how it goes.

The episode starts with Hal awaking a virtual vampire army being adorable and singing "Puttin' on the Ritz" as seen here:

Bad Hal is back again, and GOD is he hot.  Oh, sorry, no I mean bad... very very bad.  Hal tells his new baby vamps that they are an army against the werewolves.  Of course Tom comes in and ruins the whole thing, killing every new vampire.  This is followed by he and Hal have a most excellent fight, but what of Alex?

Alex, you awesome lovely ghost you.  She can't rent-a-ghost out, so she goes all Kill Bill and digs herself out of her own grave, giving us some great zombie hand as she burst through the ground.  Alex is just in time to stop Hal and Tom from killing each other.  In her own badass way, she tells the warring wolf and vampire that "Shit is getting real" and explains what is happening with Hatch... you know being the devil and all.  Hal explains that there is a ritual, kinda not explaining that it will kill anybody who performs it.  On the way out the door Hal steals a dying vamps blood, because you know he ain't going down with the rest of them.

When they go outside everyone, and I mean everyone is dead.  Suicide after suicide.  And then there is Rook.  Rook who has already had a run in with the devil, who has asked for one last favor.  Rook, who just wanted his MIB or whatever department back, he wasn't expecting a deal with the devil.  Without knowing what the devil has asked of him, Rook is accosted by the Trinity.  He begs them to understand why he did what he did and then he dropps the bomb, the devil has the emergency broadcast codes... now he can whisper in the world's ear.  Hal, Tom and Alex leave Rook to get to the TV station, and Rook, well, he is picked up by the government guy who was shutting his unit down.  All of Rook's dreams have come true.

At the station, whoever isn't dead is zombie-fied by the devil who has already starting his broadcast.  It's a bit we've heard before, about why the devil exists, why God made us, just with a Being Human spin, saying that even without the devil, humans were able to do bad all by themselves.

But before he could whisper to the world, Hal, Alex and Tom come to interrupt him.  He pauses his broadcast with some classic Being Human and humor we get a "We will be back in a moment" message with somebody making some pottery.  Love it.

Before the ritual can be done, the Devil sends each of them to a moment in time that could change everything.  Hal ends up back to the day he was turned, the ghost of his werewolf friend Leo haunting him.  Alex is alive on the day of her date with Hal, just hours before she dies, with her dear father.  And Tom... Tom is the most difficult of all.  The devil shows Tom with an origami wolf what's missing from the picture.  The wolf.  Not only is Tom's wolf gone represented by nothing but origami, he is married to the adorable Allison who is pregnant with their child:

  But no matter how tempting these alternate lives are, they are not fooled by the devil.  In a last ditch effort the devil tells Tom that Hal isn't using his own blood, but at this point it doesn't matter.  All three of them know that while these worlds are worth while, the real world needs saving.

They end up back at the station, the devil has lost.  Tom calls Hal out for not giving his blood, knowing now that the the ritual will only weaken Hatch.  But it's too late and Alex says fuck it.  She makes Hal promise that the next time the devil gets strength he will defeat him, but before Alex could drink the blood, she drops the glass.  

The devil gets back on the air and is about to give his murderous message, but before he does, the black evilness leaves the body.  Hatch says something in some ancient tongue sounding really scared and confused... and then his brains get blown the fuck all over the wall by Rook.  Well... that was easy.  So, so disappointingly easy.

All goes back to normal, the mass suicide explained away my noxious gas.  Well... that was simple.  Thankfully I noticed there were 15 minutes left and hunkered down for some plot twisting.  Hal, Tom and Alex are back in the house.  Hal gives a lovely little speech about the want to be human is actually the act of being human, and it's touching and sweet.

But, we still have bad Hal and Tom and Alex  have planned to kill him.  Just before the stake goes in to bad Hal's heart, there's a knock at the door.  And that fist behind that knock is Rook, so Hal and Tom parlay.

Rook tells the trio that he has quit his job, but that his government team is back together.  Alex flips out, wanting to kill Rook for the part he played, she screams on and on and stupid me is sitting there annoyed that Rook says nothing because he can't hear Alex.  Boy am I stupid because Hal noticed.  And Rook confesses that he is now the devil.  

Shit get's really real and Rook lets out a scream like a tornado and Alex and Tom convince Hal that they have to do the ritual, and he gives in, adding his blood to Toms and giving it to Alex to drink it down.  The devil leave's Rook in his swarming blackness as Hal, Tom and Alex lay choking on the floor, writhing in pain.    

Hal is able to get control fast enough to tell Rook that he will be possessed again if they don't do something.  Rook finds a stake on the floor and tells him that once the devil re-enters to kill him.  And Hal does.  And all four of them lay dead on the floor and I have tears in my eyes and holy shit, holy shit they did it again everyone is dead.

And then a moan.  And then some movement.  AND THEY ARE ALL OK!  And I am relieved and disappointed at the same time.  And it isn't until they notice Alex is bleeding that they realize she is human again... and Tom finds the wolf gone and Hal... Hal can see his reflection... 

They are human.  Without the devil, they live once again.

Some time has passed by, and they are all still getting used to being alive again.  Alex eats her face off,

and Hal and Tom try to figure out what to do.  It's sweet, Hal obviously loves Alex and she love him back (though we are robbed of more sexy kisses).  The show ends with the three of them settling down on the couch to watch some TV and then it happens.

Inception.  A pan shot:

Mitchell's gloves.. Oh!  George's medal, Annie's Tea cup...

Nina's scan... Eve's bib...Hal's domino

The origami wolf the devil made Tom

Fuck.  My.  Life.  They did die.  And their heaven is happy together.

At least that's my interpretation.  Because this show has been brave since minute one and the only way for them to go out is with their deaths.

I'm happy with the way the show ended, but I truly believe that this show had life in it yet!  They could have had many more seasons... but we get six last episodes...  At least they were six great episodes, with great plots and a great cast.  I am disappointed that we didn't see the original three at all, I was hoping against hope that we would see Annie, George and Mitchell but no such luck... at least they were mentioned.

Well RIP Being Human, you gave me a ton of joy and tears and I will cherish the time we had.

Being Human: No Care, All Responsibility (summery with spoilers)

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!  If you are down on Being Human for the loss of the entire original cast, this episode more than makes up for it.  This season has been epic, truly, every episode fantastic, but this... THIS my friends was why we watch TV.  Shit just got real folks.  I watch Being Human on my computer with my headphones on, my dad must think I'm batshit crazy because as I watch this episode I was either covering my eyes with Tom's awkwardness around women, or clutching my face in horror muttering "nonononono" as everything Tom, Hal and Alex have built fall apart around them.  Oh my God this show is so, so amazing it's orgasmic.  Yeah you heard me.  Gear up folks, this is a long one.

The episode starts years back as Rook takes some new Men In Black or whatever the hell they call themselves through a vampire feeding ground.  After one of the newbies pukes at the sight of a women's exposed trachea, Rook explains that the only way to do this job is to have "No care, all responsibility."  Now we can understand Rook's lot in life a bit better.  It isn't until he finds a little girl who survives the bloodbath that we see a tiny crack in the hard shell.  Rook determines that she is human, and saves her just in time as vampires tear apart his new recruits.  No care, all responsibility.

Flash forward to Hal doing push ups to fight his cravings.  Why did you have to drink that blood Hal!  Why did you do it!?  Your breaking my heart.  Alex calls a house meeting, urging Hal and Alex to see that Hatch has something to do with this string of suicides.  Both boys blow her off, but Tom promises to try and ask Hatch on his feelings about the occult before he leaves for work.  Then, Alex finally gets something off her chest that we've all been wondering about.  She had/has feelings for Hal, it's time they both talk about it.  Hal is a bit busy hiding a flask of blood in his back pocket, but he agrees it is time.  Then it dawns on Hal that Rook had mentioned something about the suicides.  He tells Alex he'll go talk to him.  Alex is excited and wants to go with him, but of course we all know Hal just wants blood, but he can't stop the eager Alex from going.

Not much really happens at Rooks office, Alex gets her hands on the file about all of the suicides and excitedly leaves.  Hal admits to Rook that he's back on the blood and asks for more.  Rook has some bad news, the is no more.  There is no safe way for Hal to get blood.  Uh oh.

While Tom awkwardly tries to ask Hatch about his feelings on the "quilt...on the carf..." he witnesses a girl being chased.  She takes refuge in the hotel, and Tom sends the baddie away.  He goes to check on the girl, whose received a pretty nasty hand wound.  As always Tom is the gentlemen and when the girl realizes she's missed work, he not only fixes up her hand, but gives her a job.  I mean, Tom is assistant manager (which by the way it definitely says "ass man" on his name tag) so he can hire people now.  But when Tom introduced Natasha (that's her name) to Hal the blood is too much.

Tom starts crushing on the cutie Natasha hard.  He even does a weird boner walk that is totally cringe worthy.  He convinces himself she is a succubus because he's never felt this way before, but after Alex ghost tests him they are sure she is human.  Hal worries that he is cheating on his werewolf girlfriend from last season, but Alex assures him that they are not together and its okay for him to have these feelings.

Later, Natasha finds Hal in a bad way.  She sort of flaunts her bloody hand in front of him as he goes through seriously bad withdrawal   Leaving in a hurry, Hal doesn't watch the mirror and Natasha notices his lack of reflection.  The baddie who was chasing her comes back to find her, but Hal protects her.  Later, Hal uses this mysterious past against her and fires her.  But BOOM, she calls him out for being a vampire and tells him she'll help him.  In a very disturbingly sexy scene, Hal takes blood from her thigh for ten seconds to help him curb the cravings.

Well apparently blood is the vampire Viagra, because Hal is feeling frisky.   He goes home to find Alex pouring over the file of the hotel suicides.  She is particularly interested in a image written in blood on a wall, but most of it's been wiped a way.  She asks Hal to take a look but the THIS FUCKING HAPPENS:

UGHHH THAT KISS WAS SO HOT!  Why is HAL SO HOT!  He doesn't look like the kind of guy who would make a girl swoon but HELLO SWOONING OVER HERE!  Sadly, a sexually confused Tom bursts in the door asking Hal and Alex how exactly you do the nasty.  Alex asks if McNair ever taught him about the bird and the bees to which he responds he knows all the birds in the forest and knew how to steal honey from bees.  OH MY GOD this scene was adorably awkward!  After Alex gets shot down for offering to steal Tom some porn (which he won't watch because THOSE GIRLS MIGHT BE MOTHERS SOMEDAY) Tom decided to go to the library.

The next day Tom asks Natasha on a proper date and gives her a, not as hot has Hal's, kiss.  Her phone rings, but she ignores it.  Hal meanwhile is getting cranky.  After Alex knocks Hatch out of his wheelchair in an effort to prove he can see her, Hal freaks out and tells her to just go home.  Hal, then catches up to Natasha and tells her the arraignment is off, which only ends up lasting for like 5 seconds until a bride to be comes in with a bloody knee and Hal nearly kills her.  Then he begs Natasha for just one last time.

Of course, Alex can't listen and goes to Hatch's room where she discovers that Hatch can see her, but uh-oh she finds Hal having... a snack.  She freaks out at him and tells him to never come home because she will stake him if he comes back.  They both agree not to tell Tom what was going on.

But that's not even the big reveal of the episode.  That call Natasha doesn't take... IT'S ROOK!  She is the little girl from the beginning of the episode.  She is a little Rook in training!  After meeting Tom and Hal, she doesn't want to go through with the plan, but No Care, All Responsibility.  She tells Tom that Hal forced her to let him feed from her.  Tom freaks out and leaves stakes in hand.  But as Tom is leaving Hal is coming in, and he legitimately asks Alex for help.  She ties him back up, but only to get clean, then he is out.

Flash to Natasha back with Rook and Hatch.  Natasha tells Rook she can't go through with it, she is going to tell Tom the truth.  Rook pleads with her, telling her that she is like family, but when you live your life No Car, All Responsibly, well you can't have family.  Rook leaves Natasha with a threat, but no threat is greater that Hatch and when he whispers in Natasha's ear we know there is trouble.  She goes to the supernatural house, finds Hal tied up.  With a knife she cuts Hal free... THEN SLITS HER FUCKING THROAT!  Hal tries to save her, but its in vain ans she dies in his arms.

When Tom and Alex find him, he tries to explain Tom won't hear it, and just before driving a stake through Hal's heart, Alex separateness them.  For the first time Tom truly loses it calling Alex a coward as he storms out.  Hal pleads with Alex to believe him, but with the knife having mysteriously disappeared she doesn't know what to believe.  Feeling everybody has giving up on him Hal leaves.  Hatch is in his room having a Devil freaking orgasm.  This has made him strong again.

Just after Hal slams the door on Alex's face, the ghost of Natasha calls to her.  She explains that this was all Rook's doing but she doesn't know why she committed this final act of martyrdom when she wanted to make things right.  Then, the scariest this ever happens... HER FUCKING CORPSE TALKS IN A DEMON VOICE:

HE WILL RISE.  Alex puts two and two together and realizes that was the writing on the wall.  Natasha remembers talking to Hatch, but she doesn't remember what he said.  Natasha's door opens with her confessions and Alex tells her to walk through.  Alex has to go see Hatch.  She accosts him, calling him Wrinkle Tits, which I was personally a fan of.  He ignores her until the last minute when he proclaims "I'm only the fucking devil sweetheart" and throws poor Alex through a mirror.

But there is no time to worry about Alex because it's all gone south.  Tom is on the warpath and Hal is on the blood.

Hal the monster is back with vengeance and Tom is going to kill him.

But what happened to Alex?  Where the hell did that mirror take her?  There is nothing but darkness, as she talks the audience through whats going on around her.  Something long, oh a weapon?  No its slimy.  Oh, good thing her dead self carries a cell phone.... that slimy thing... yeah it's a skull... and it didn't take the pan up to the tombstone to realize that the rotting body... was hers.  Yep..  Alex is trapped in her own coffin... OOHHH MAN OH MAN OH MAN!

WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT!  AUUGGH! I can't wait a whole week!  This show is so, SO well written an acted!  I can't.  I'm dying.  I'm dead.

Being Human... WITH JULIAN BARRATT (Spoilers)

So as a monster Boosh fan, a monster Being Human fan and, well, a monster monster fan, tonight's mash up gave me a full on nerdgasm.  Not to mention that I've been following Ripper Street and who else shows up in tonight's episode?  DI Edmund Reid's wife Emily (played by the lovely and beautiful Amanda Hale)!  Oh it's just so overwhelming!  Barratt showed us what Howard would have become if it hadn't been for Vince, and it was epic... I miss the Boosh.

So tonight's episode was called Pie and Prejudice, and while I loved this episode for all of the reasons I already mentioned, I had one huge problem with it... It was almost exactly like the season 1 episode "Tully".  A lonely and scared werewolf gets taken advantage of by an older, seemingly more successful werewolf.  Just like the first time around, the housemates get pissed when the invited/uninvited furry guest overstays their welcome.  Despite the fact that it was the same episode I didn't care because Julian fucking Barratt.

Barratt played asshole weatherman Larry, who lives a semi-charmed life until he is scratched by a werewolf. Then he becomes a con artist, traveling and public speaking about a book he's never even read.  Tom, yet again struggling to be just as good as Hal, sees Larry as a new father figure.  Larry's a successful werewolf. And Tom is a perfect mark.  Larry tells Tom that he will teach him how to be a successful werewolf and Tom jumps at the chance, praying to make his father, McNair, will be proud.  Larry wiggles his way in to the triple supernatural home, and makes a very unwelcome guest.  The Tom competing with Hal gig is getting a bit tired, but I'll allow it this one more episode.

While Howar...I mean Larry, takes Tom for a ride, Hal goes to meet with his 250 year old ghost friend Marie (Hale).  Of course, Alex jumps at the chance to meet another ghost.  Hal refuses, Marie is a sensible lady of her time and he will not have Alex corrupting her!  Of course Alex goes anyhow, and Marie asks Hal if they can spend time, girl to girl.  And then we find out that Marie is batshit totally insane.  She curses, reads peoples minds, and has shags in gross bathroom stalls.  Alex is horrified.  She asks Marie whats happened to her and why she continues to lie to Hal about her lady like nature.  Turns out Marie thinks she was Hal's last victim.  She thinks she is keeping him clean with his visits, she thinks she is so helpful that she's been turning down doors for centuries!

Of course, Alex has to meddle.  She brings Marie home, where she does her best to act lady like as she can, but Larry is being a total lech.  The second Hal leaves the room, she threatens to cut Larry's balls off in the night and stabs the chair a bit close to his bait and tackle.  Hal sees but can't believe, but still refuses to tell Marie the truth.

After nearly losing his balls, Larry storms off to his room to punch a mirror.  Alex begs Tom to see the light about Larry and when Tom goes up to see if Larry is ok he finally does.  Also, Larry calls Tom "TomTom" which was hilarious.  In very Howard fashion, Larry seems to believe the bullshit he is spewing but FINALLY Tom calls him out.  Larry tells Tom that it's the wolf that holds them back, but Tom would never know because he's never known what its like to be human.  Tom leaves, he's going back to the woods where he belongs because he'll never be able to be really human.  He will never make McNair proud.

Confession time for Hal and Marie.

It doesn't go well.  Marie freaks out when she finds out Hal has only been clean 50 years.

But no time to worry, Alex and Hal have to find Tom, who is living next to McNair's grave.  And crying his eyes out.  TOM YOU ARE BREAKING MY HEART!  Hal tries to convince Tom that he is an amazing human and it's not the beast inside that has ruined him.  Hal knows what it's like to have a beast.  But Tom won't have it and Hal goes to have it out with Larry.  We see them confront each other, but the screen cuts to Alex and Tom having a heart to heart.

Alex convinces Tom to come home, but they enter to a bit of a nightmare.  Hal is fighting off a stake pointed at his heart.  Marie's revenge.  But they talk her off the ledge and it all works out, yey.  But what of Larry?

HAL FUCKING KILLED HIM!  NO!  JULIANNN!  He was so fantastic!  How can they let him go so fast!  After Larry begged to see the beast inside of Hal, he saw it... and was choked to death with an electrical cord.  Sigh, but it was so good to see Julian Barratt on TV again.

But, Larry's death did help somebody.  Hal has to call Rook to clean up his new mess.  Good thing too, cuz Rook was about to blow his brains out.

All and all this episode was actually hilarious.  Between Barratt being somewhat Howard-ish and Hale being hilarious cursing and being an awful person you couldn't help but laugh, a lot.  But, there was no devil this time around, so what is he up too?  Hal killing Larry must have given him a real hard on.

Anyway, did I mention I miss the Boosh?

Being Human: Sticks and Rope (Spoilers)

ALEX!  Look at you!  Carving out a niche for yourself on this show!  And good God, this episodes actually scared me.  At one point I even let out a scream, which was weird because I was watching it on my computer with my headphones on and my dad looked at me like I was insane.  But little boy ghosts are super creepy.  This season is going to be epic.... especially with who will be in the next episode, but we'll get there... despite the fact that I am bursting with fountains of joy.

This episode had three main components, Hal and Tom in competition for employee of the month, Alex gets stuck with the ghost of a Victorian boy and Rook using Crumb to try to save his organization.

Hal and Tom are in competition.  Again.  Haven't we seen this before?  Yeah, we have but the whole thing ended with a food fight and you can't hate that.  Basically, Tom wants to feel like he matters, so when an employee of the month competition comes around, he sees it as his opportunity to prove himself.  Of course, their boss is pining after Hal, so even when Hal purposely tries to suck at his job, Tom somehow gets screwed.  It doesn't help that both of them have the devil whispering in their ear.

We learned in the season premiere that the devil feeds on the hatred between werewolves and vampires, so he pits Hal and Tom against each other.  At first it works, but Alex is able to make both men see reason.  Not before the two boys have a monster food fight in the middle of the hotel dinning room.  Their boss fires Tom blaming him for the whole thing, and Hal did the whole "if he goes, I go" thing and they are both sacked.  But the devil can't have that!  So he gets that snobby boss to hire them back.  Then he makes he face bleed, which was totally fucked, and she cleans herself up by killing herself.  But the devil needs one last thing to happen before He Will Rise.  Ghost girl's gotta go.  She keeps the peace between the werewolf and vampire, and he can't have that.  BTW, Phil Davis is absolutely fantastic and needs an award.

While this is going on, the scariest thing to ever happen in Being Human history is occurring   The ghost of a little boy starts haunting Alex.  It is the creepiest thing ever when she hears her name in the child's voice as water drips into the sink.  Each drop whispers the name "Alex."  When she turns the sink on, the most horrifying screams come with it.  Terrified she runs to get Hal and Tom.  Together, the three of them find the boy, named Oliver, who turns out isn't really scary so much as a pain in the ass.  And kind of racist.  At first he is demanding, driving Alex insane.  But Tom, being awesome entertains the boy at least for a while.

Alex hits the wall and sends Oliver to his room.  Hal suggests that she go talk to him.  Before she opens the door she hears little Oliver talking to a creepy voice coming through an old radio.  Alex asks who he is talking to, but Oliver won't answer.  Alex softens, and the next day she and Oliver have a great time.  Alex is reminded of her brothers, and really takes the young ghost under her wing.  Oliver starts to feel guilty and admits his past to her.  He tells her he is afraid of the men with sticks and rope, who went after Annie once.  Oliver felt responsible for the drowning death of his little brother, and he committed suicide.  He goes to tell Alex what he's been up to when the lights go out and neither ghost can exit.  Then things get horrifying.  

Oliver's dripping wet scary ass ghost brother shows up.  At first they run from him. but Alex realizes this is his unfinished business.  Oliver goes to his brother, and it seems all is well and the HOLY FUCKING SHIT ITS THE DEMON GUYS WITH STICKS AND ROPES!  I screamed, that happened.  We see the devil is using these guys as a mouthpiece, saying he must take one of the ghosts to hell, and Alex volunteers   Oliver tries to argue, but the men with sticks and ropes grab her.  In the nick of time Oliver's dripping wet scary ass ghost brother reappears and Oliver's door opens.  Alex tells him to walk through and close the door on his way.  The closed door ends the devil's connection with the demons, but they don't vanish until they leave a message.  He. Will. RRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

Poor Crumb.  This episode we find him locked up by Rook and starving.  Rook promises him blood, once he helps Rook out.  Crumb has lost it.  He has gone totally off the rails.  He agrees to help Rook, but he doesn't realize that he is agreeing to be trapped in a room with his sister and niece with extreme blood lust.  Rook's partner begs him to spare the child, but Rook feels sacrifices must be made.  A starving Crumb kills his sister and niece both.  Poor Crumb is just a nerdy guy who has gotten mixed up in a mess he has no idea how to fix.  Rook shows the video of Crumb killing his family to try and save his department but it's no use.

After killing his family Crumb finds Hal and begs for help.  He feels the monster rising inside of him and begs Hal to save him, but Hal refuses shoving him out the door.  We next see Crumb standing next to some body of water when Rook's partner comes, asking to be turned.  He is a nerdy guy just like Crumb, and they believe they can help each other.  Are these two bullied nerd vamps going to cause a commotion?  Is it all a trick to save this supernatural department?  We'll see!

But after this whole great episode what am I most excited about.

 JULIAN FUCKING BARRATT!  The Boosh Boy hasn't been around an awful lot lately, and with Noel doing Luxury Comedy I think we've all longed to see his face again.  AND THERE IT IS!  There it fucking is!  Look at him!  Can't you hear him saying "Hey how's it going, I'm comin' atcha like a bee, like a buzzard."  I watched the show on a terrible internet connection so I didn't even realize it was him, thanks Tumblr. for clearing that up for me.  I AM SO EXCITED!  I have always been a Howard girl, I can get down with elbow patches and slap base.  LETS DO THIS! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Being Human: Series 5 Premiere (spoilers)

Here they are!  Our new trinity Hal, Alex and Tom!  God!  I love this show!  BBC I love you!  In a very Doctor Who fashion, Being Human has replaced it's entire original cast with a completely new one in a way that is not only engaging, but didn't even make me mad about losing Mitchell, Annie and George.  Don't get me wrong, I miss them with my whole heart and soul, but at the same time I've been able to move past their deaths and attach myself to the incoming cast.  Well done!  Here is a recap of the episode, followed by my conclusions on what this season has to bring.

Last night was Being Human's series 5 premiere episode entitled, The Trinity.  Now the hardest part of being a fan of this show is that as an American, I have to find a way to stream the damn thing.  Last year it was so easy to stream that I could watch the show on the same night it aired, but now-a-days with a huge government crackdown on pirating and streaming it's real work.  Took me almost a half hour to find a usable link, and then it froze halfway through, so I had to pause it for another half hour just so it would load back to where I had it.  That's commitment people!  BBC let Americans watch your shows online!  I would pay to watch, seriously I would.  But no, we get BBC America so we can watch Top Gear for 12 hours, and then Gordon Ramsey for another 12.  Thanks.

Okay, back to the show.  I was very impressed with this premiere episode for this cast.  In the opening sequence it's 1918 and find Hal in his bad boy days.  A cloaked woman runs into an impressive estate and finds Hal, shirtless, sleeping on a bed.  She goes to stake him, but it was all a trap and a sexy, slightly humorous fight ensues.  We soon find out the woman is Lady Catherine, a werewolf.  Hal calls for parley, and they both realized that somebody is fanning the flames in war between the vampires and werewolves, they call temporary peace to find out who.  While, I loved Mitchell, I really enjoy that Hal's back story is so long and full of endless possibility.

The show picks back up only a few weeks after Annie blows herself and Eve (and Mycroft) into the next world.  Hal is still tied to a chair, being spoon fed by the ever adorable baby faced Tom.  Seriously, Tom has the cutest puppy dog eyes, pun intended.  The place is a total sty, and it's tearing anal retentive Hal apart, he begs to be untied, at least to just clean up.  Alex and Tom decide to untie him permanently as long as he swears on Eve to behave.  After cleaning up, Tom informs Hal that they've lost their job at the cafe, so they go off on the search for a new one.

We then flash to this mysterious government organization that has taken Alex's body.  Mr. Rook has captured one of the oldest vampires who is ironically a little girl.  Now that all the old ones are dead (thanks Annie) order in the vampire world is a bit, well, screwed.  In a hilarious exchange in which this little girl swears and demands cigarettes, she tells him that there is one old one left, human sympathizer Hal.  In exchange for information about Hal, she will flown back home, to which she responds "Make sure they have crayons, so I can draw ponies and shit."  

Mr. Rook finds Hal interviewing for a job at a local rundown looking hotel.  He tries to convince Hal to lead the vampires.  Without the old ones there is chaos but he believes Hal could unite them, for all the free blood he could have.  Hal refuses, but Mr. Rook adds a bit of mystery to his offer.  This hotel has been notorious for suicides, he asks Hal to at least keep an eye on what may be going on.  In the dining room, we see another great Sherlock cross over sitting in a wheelchair.  There sits Captain Hatch, being a total grumpy tool, yelling at the waitstaff and scowling.  Played by the brilliant Philip Davis of Whitechapel fame, and let's not forget he was fabulous as the murderous cab driver in Sherlock's pilot.  Needless to say, my ears certainly perked up.  

Hal is not only shaken by his meeting with Mr. Rook, who waved some blood in his face, but to add insult to injury Alex calls him out on her death for the millionth time, bringing Hal to the edge.  Earlier in the episode there was an odd break where we meet Ian Crumb, a bumbling office idiot quite similar to Michael from the office.  He is told that he is on review and will have to re-apply for the job he already has.  Needless to say he is having a bad day, which only gets worse when he bumps into a very edgy  Hal... and then decides to pick a fight.  Bad movie Ian.  Hal manifests his inner vampire and Ian freaks the fuck out... only to be hit by a car.  What choice does Hal have?  He turns Ian and locks him in the basement.  In Being Human fashion, as Hal tries to hide his misdoing, Alex and Tom show up to have a chat.  In a desperate attempt to get Tom and Alex far away from Ian, he tells Alex he met with the man who stole her body and gives his location.

Since Alex is convinced that her unfinished business is to get her body to her family she goes to Mr. Rooks place of work.  Of course the good natured Hal must accompany her, because he was taught how to treat a woman.  She finds her file and learns that her body was already given to her family.  She was buried and everybody was already moving on.  She is devastated  and Tom does his best to comfort her.  As she is stealing her files, we see Mr. Rook in his boss's office.  The government is downsizing and Mr. Rook's special branch is being shut down.  Mr. Rook doesn't take this news well.

After Alex has had a good and proper meltdown over her stolen death, Ian finally gets their attention.  Alex and Tom find him tied to the radiator, begging to know whats going on, even though Hal has already explained it all.  Ian is still convinced he is tied up to be given a proper bumming by Hal on a later date.  Tom flips, convinced that Hal drank blood and storms off, Alex, pitying the bumbling Ian, let's him free.  Big mistake.  You see, Ian decides to go back to work, where he is immediately sacked.  Well, we've seen what happens when vampires get angry.

Tom immediately accosts Hal when he walks in the door, but once Hal explains himself he and Tom decided it best to keep Ian locked up, but whoops, Alex already let him out.  They find him at work, feasting on the blood of the employee who's replaced him as his coworkers stare in abject fear.  Ian has turned on that switch, that Vampire badness.  Oh, he is brilliant and now he is bad, bad, bad.  Hal threatens to destroy them both, holding a stake between both their hearts.  All it would take is one good chest bump and they are both done for, and I start getting really nervous.  Being Human has no problem killing main characters off.  "NOT YET!" I scream at my computer just as Mr. Rook and his crew come to clean up the mess.  Once it's all neat and tidy, Mr. Rook strikes some sort of deal with Ian, and you have to wonder what they are up too.  I'm sure it will be good.

Now, through the episode we keep flashing back to Hal and Lady Catherine who enlist the help of a ghost necromancer.  It turns out that it's the devil who is pinning the werewolves against the vampires, so once again we have a ghost, a werewolf and a vampire working together, and it's pretty obvious Hal has a thing for Lady Catherine.  

Using the body of a local mad man as a vessel, the three plan to do a blood ritual to trap the devil inside.  Once the ghost drinks the blood of a vampire mixed with the blood of a werewolf, the devil enters.  But we have a problem.  Hal was a coward.  He didn't use his own blood, he didn't complete the Trinity.  The Ghost and poor Lady Catherine meet their final ends and the devil escapes in a mad man's body.  Of course, it doesn't take much brain power to realize that the devil is our crotchety Captain Hatch, who at the end of the episode whispers into a waitress's ear.  She promptly commits suicide but not before leaving a message in her own blood.  He Will Rise.

I am so excited about this season, even if it does seem to be completely revolving around Hal.  We have two separate baddies, the devil in human form and the government with a raging vampire.  I hope there is more for Tom coming up because it seemed that he was a bit pushed to the side in this episode, and while Alex was a wee bit whiny I like that she's a tough cookie.  She is certainly not the motherly figure Annie was, that job seems to fall to Tom.  We also have Hal still getting over the blood lust and his boss at the hotel seems to be pining after him.  Never pine after a vampire, it never ends well, just ask Alex or Lauren from season 1.  In the end, I think these three have a good camaraderie especially Tom and Hal, Alex is still working on it.  I can't wait to see whats coming because this show never fails to shock!